What is happening with everyone???

I'm just gonna put what is in my heart here, sorry for the bad words, I don't usually use them...

I always keep my opinions to myself, cuz I saw what giving your opinion on the internet can cause. I'm not saying it's a bad opinion, but people can misunderstand it (especially if you're on Twitter), but I just need to talk.

What the fuck is happening, like, for real?

Like... I see people from my living circle dating, or dressing more mature (people even younger than me, I'm a minor), and I'm here, not interested in anybody, in a new live in a new continent and i cant even fucking say that im not enjoying it cuz i dont want to get in trouble, i just have to smile and say im enjoying it, even thou i feel unconfortable. Every plan that I made just vanished, I don't have my friends with me, my gramma is making us stress like she usually does, and what the fuck am I supposed to do? smile? I have smiled enough bitch.

Ig that's just teenager stuff... I just want to feel good, but last year was also very stressful, it's hard to enjoy your high school years when u have exams every day.

Am I doing something wrong? wtf...

I don't see myself in the future because it's so unpredictable for me, I'm not saying that I'm gonna unalive myself, but I'm saying that it's just...I can't see it, alright? It's dark and bright at the same time.

I miss the summer days that I spent in my grandmother's house in the south of Brazil...

Nothing is the same anymore... Is this how growing up feels like?