oh ya selfie time + life

It has been months since I posted a pic on here, I had to re-watch a tutorial vid!! 

I turn eighteen on Saturday, and I have absolutely no plans. I've never done anything for my birthday besides hang out with family, have dinner of my choice, and of course cake and ice cream afterwards. I'm unfortunately quite antisocial in real life, and it's put me in a spot where I don't feel too secure in the few friendships I have. Not enough to invite them over to my home...it truly sucks thinking and feeling this way, but alas!!

Anyway, I have 30-something days left of high school, and I swear on ALL OF YOUR SOULS that I am actively counting down the days, hours, minutes, seconds...I cannot wait to get through with that hellhole. Especially attending a California school, I am outside 24/7 facing all kinds of weather. Like today, it was so damn windy my hair went through the ringer. Also, unhealthily so, another reason I cannot wait to leave is to cease socialization. To go completely ghost - which I sort-of already am online to my peers. I find that I'm too awkward and anxious these days, so it feels like a survival game every school day. I look forward to wandering around on my own at some JC down the hill from here. Besides that, it's also of course struggling to wake up on time and combat the workloads. Either senioritis is killing me on some extreme level, or I'm going through some kind of depression. Who knows. These feelings have even had me considering choosing not to attend graduation - to skip out on walking the stage - and simply pick up my diploma instead. I also almost didn't purchase a prom ticket, but I did in the end which I'm still having second thoughts about. Urrrgh my mind is so annoying.

Once I graduate, I really hope I can invest more time into the things I enjoy like reading, writing, drawing...all that good stuff. I hope the summer treats me well, and whichever junior college I choose to attend.

Anyway, before I end this - totally random, but recently I was stalking my aunts old Facebook posts and I seriously lost my mind at the amount of times she's gotten to take pictures with Jensen Ackles oh mai glob