March 22, 2026 - Tokyo

Having spent so much time away from a "proper" violin practice system, I decided to jump back into practicing Carl Flesch again after, and I would hate to admit, approximately two years. As for what I did in those two years, it was a lot of experimental practice. Initially, after having picking up scales after all this time, I had no idea what to expect and it made me question my progresses up to this day. But it turned out beyond my expectation. All the experimental work I'd done has trained me to be malleable mentally and I experienced greater freedom in this humdrum violin exercise. 

I hope that by resurrecting this old routine it would mold my left hand into a consistent shape that can provide me with a framework that I'm going to rely on. 

Despite all the newly gained autonomy as a uni student now, I still find myself going back to old systems built by my former professors. They were strict, but surely effective. 

Once getting back into shape, I'll pour all my attention on practicing the "Paganiniana". To prepare for my upcoming audition in May, I'm planning to play it in as many different performance contexts as possible. I'm going to phone up my family, drag my friends to watch me play and get myself out there as much as I can. 

There's been several heavy distractions in my life lately, but the urgency to succeed in school has never reigned so highly above all. I hope all will be good when I have a promised career, when I have independency in choosing how I want my life to turn out. Honestly, I'm miserable when I have to detach myself from all that I love when I find myself in a "lock in" period. I really have to be heartless - towards myself. I hope it won't be too late to return to them once this subsides. Frankly, I am very sad. 

Anaïs