You never held me

Every night before bed I hug her and every time I cry I wrap my hands around her digging my face into her shoulders as she stays tense. It’s always been this way our bond has always resembled a hunk of lead so very heavy but ever so weak unable to hold a specific form always bending and twisting under the pressure of feathers.I view her as a metal though however impressionable its value does carry through the whole world.