When is it my turn

10: I wish my mother was around more

11: I wish my mother was around more

I think I'm ugly

I wish somebody would show me affection 

I feel uncomfortable with who I am

12: I wish my mother was around more

I think I'm ugly

I wish somebody would show me affection 

I feel uncomfortable with who I am

I want to go on puberty blockers 

I want to change my name

13: I wish my mother was around more

I think I'm ugly

I wish somebody would show me affection 

I feel uncomfortable with who I am

I want to go on puberty blockers 

I want to change my name

14: I wish my mother was around more

I think I'm ugly

I wish somebody would show me affection 

I feel uncomfortable with who I am

I want to go on testosterone 

I want to change my name 

15: I wish my mother was around less

I think I'm ugly

I wish somebody would show me affection 

I feel uncomfortable with who I am

I want to go on testosterone 

I want to change my name 

> ergo, it never gets better. You just get older and older and more desperate and disgusting and it chars you from the inside out. Turns you into someone you hate. Your adult problems turn into bigger adult problems. He's still watching me from the building across from mine. Sometimes I watch him lean over and little like he's about to fall and it's like im watching something that's going to happen. I'll never be like any of you, I'll always be a frakenstein. Bits of other things pieced together trying to blend in. I speak to you and you spit acid in my eyes so I can't look at you anymore and everyday I tell myself this is it but always I go back and I'm begging you to take pity on me just stick the knife all the way in, it hurts. When I was born I didn't cry right away and the doctor hit me until I did, I was quiet and then I started wanting and I never stopped.