Cruising sounds a bit too lavish.

I don't think it's weird to say that as you start to reach the big one eight that the mask of adulthood clicking into place quickly turns into a competition of who can put on the mask the best or how they can decorate their lives to feel accomplished enough to be happy to say that they are adults and that they are responsible.

I do kind of feel like this is a pessimistic take, but I fear that as I grow up that kind of lifestyle makes me a bit sick of hearing about responsibility when everyone's just a bigger and bigger kid.

Responsibility is a scary thing, suddenly one day your thrown into the sea and told you could do anything with it; but keep in mind without a good boat or financial level of security you'll be both slower, more tired and probably end up unable to do most things at all. 

All this to say I feel like I'm sailing on a raft atm, while I see others younger than me starting to build that raft, albeit better or worse than mine. And I look out to the expanse of ships on the sea and the horizon and I wonder where IM gonna go, just a bit daunting you know.

Thank you for listening to me yap icl I'm still in bed who am I to talk about all this 😭.