2/19/26 Blog

Another day of bedrotting woohoo. I'm not exactly sure what to write about here since it was just another day of me lounging about. 

I'm probably gonna spend another night laying here, playing games. I really wanna infodump about my special interests but I wanna get this blog out. The only problem is that... I dunno what to write about! Literally *nothing* happened today. It was super boring, hella uneventful.

The highlight of my day was eating this super yummy ice cream! It's like, Cappuccino Fudge Blitz. Absolutely delicious. 

Oh, there is one important thing! In less then 20 minutes as I am writing this, it'll be exactly a month to my birthday. I'll be 20!

This is a very morbid thing to admit but, I wasn't really supposed to be around this long lol. I was in such a dark, awful place as I grew up; no family that respected me. But, soon i'll be on this earth for twenty whole years. As much as I struggle with my mental health, as much as people have belittled me all my life. Right now, i'm happy to be alive.

Recovery isn't linear, healing will always have it's ups and downs. But, for now, i'm just content with my life. Even if I struggle at home and with my traumatic past. I am happy to be with the people I love who taught me how to love. 

Please, never forget to love those who are in your life. And, I can't ask you to love yourself. I know how hard that is, I don't even love, let alone like myself 99% of the time lmao. But, the best advice I can give as somebody who struggles with chronic, severe depression. Attempt to be *okay* with yourself, don't aim for perfection and goodness. Aim for content. Not because it's a low bar, but because it's just alright to be okay for a while.

When you're mostly okay, you learn to deeply appreciate the times you were happier and reflect on the times you were upset, angry. 

Alright, enough of me being philosophical lmao. Thank you to whoever's reading!!!