man

oh boy it feels so bad when i have a lot to say and i can't find the words to express the feeling.

idk what is wrong with me but i feel like the most i'm told to not do things i wanna do them more, and i just want to make people mad bc i'm mad, babes actually i would love to insult everyone in my life till i feel better, i can't be calm when i can't access any of my two addictions and for some reason everything seems to be going just fine, not good just fine, so idk if we going up or down and when i say we i mean like idk me, myself and i.

i'm so mad all the time it is starting to annoy me, like girl you are just watching a tv show why are you screaming but bro it's the only way i feel like i let it go a little bit, man i remember one time i was listening to something and someone said that we are so self centered that we just do things to people bc we want them to give us the same treat, man i would let anyone tell at me and throw all their shit to my face for the whole day if that means i can do it too, cause i just want to scream, i want to throw all the words that come from my mouth until i stop bc i can't keep going physically, i am someone that has WAY TO MUCH TO SAY, man i talk everywhere, i text people, i write a blog, i talk i'm my close friends stories, i say dumb stuff on ig, i talk in tiktoks, i make lives, i make streams, i talk with my friends all day, i can't stop talking and still i feel like i have something to say all the fucking time, i don't even know if i want to be heard but i need to express in some fucking way bc i can't organize my mind and my feelings without saying stuff, man if i could just do what i want but i really can't, i don't even know that i want anymore, the only thing i'm sure is like prob fucking yk, but nothing else, i want to get out of my house, i want a cute little apartment where i can do fucking whatever i want.

i'm so tired and mad i'll keep going i'm ts tomorrow, gonna goon and then sleep like a champ, gn babys