I feel like I'm going crazy.

I'm not ready to be 20. I feel like I'm leaving so much behind. I won't be a teenager anymore, and adolescence is the closest thing to freedom.
Even though it was a rollercoaster of highs and lows, it was so wonderful and warm.

I don't want to grow up.

Growing up is so scary. Why can't I go back to being that 14-year-old girl I was, staying up all night watching YouTube or reading until morning, crying over celebrities I'll never meet?
Adolescence is all about vulnerability and the desire to grow up fast.
But once you've passed that milestone, you're not 14 anymore, you miss those years, and you regret not having lived them to the fullest.

I have so much to experience and a whole world to discover.

Maybe I'm not so crazy, maybe I'm just imagining things, but life goes on and I will move forward.