1: too little, too late

" a tug-of-war of leave and stay "

being in a trio is like flipping a coin. you get heads or you get tails.

i got tails.

actually no, every interaction with them feels like flipping a coin. you'd either join in on the conversation or just leave the call without saying goodbye -- to see if they'd notice amongst the sea of inside jokes and if-you-know-you-know's i never got to be a part of.

person A and person B are nice to talk to, just not together. when they're together, you'll never get a word in.

person A likes person B, maybe that's why i get left out a lot. person A wants to be more with person B, dedicating 'trio time' to 'their time'.

i guess it got to a point where every hangout they planned, i just didn't bother going.

this 'problem' doesn't seem to feel so heavy and big anymore. 

but it did around a year ago.

being in a trio doesn't always feel like a burden, but rather the fact you have to take lengths just to be noticed.

this sounds mean, and it probably is, but i don't like it when person A wants to join whenever person B and i call.

person A initiates all the inside jokes, 

the loudest one in the 'trio', 

the one who doesn't know when to stop.

sometimes i wish i was never in this 'trio'. i'm just grateful it's not a big deal for me anymore.

p.s. sorry if this sounds mean, i don't have a way with words ,, take my thoughts with a grain of salt.

- 𓋴𓉔𓇋𓂋𓄿𓇌