rant about my classmates

so im in a pretty small class, like less than 30 people. some of them used to bully me in elementary school and because this is the countryside, im stuck with them. they have been ignoring me since middle school, and i mean IGNORING. the biggest thing would happen and everyone would know except me!

in 9th grade we had a snapchat group. i was the last to be added even though people knew i had snapchat. in 10th grade, i was the last to be added to an instagram group. i didnt even know we had one, i had to argue with the kid that made it to add me! often they wouldnt even respond when i asked for homework and id have to go the teacher and be like yeah nobody told me shit, sorry i didnt come here to give yall some disease. and now in 11th grade, you know what happened?

so we were gonna raise some money for an upcoming multiple day field trip, it was a lottery for a waffle machine. two of my classmates live in the same village as me and they pulled up to my house. my dad and a family friend who was visiting bought some tickets. guess whose ass didnt know anything about the lottery.

to organise that stuff, you need a groupchat. someone has to get the price and the tickets, and then they get shared between groups. i wasnt in any group. i wasnt asked. i wasnt told anything. no one told me that hey, we have a groupchat in xyz app for the field trip, whats your username? no one. not a goddamn soul.

and you know what happened today? some chernobyl account on insta accepted my follow request. you know why? he recognized me from a previous account. 

a complete stranger recognized me. because of an account with like 3 posts that didnt have my actual name or the name komisue. an account from god knows when was tracked back to me because some random recognized my face. 

i wanted to fit in. i toned down my appearance. you know how much i yearn to wear pearls again and vkei patches and 3 belts at once and over 10 rings? i did it all to not be pointed at. in my insta, the biggest portrayal of my personality is malice mizer lyrics in my bio and mana sama as my profile picture. if i make a new account all for my interests, it gets recommended to people that know me from real life. so im out here not being bullied for the first time in ever contemplating whether or not i should start being really weird again.

honestly i already made a verdict, fuck it, chernobyl insta page with the goddamn malice mizer lyrics. mayonaka is perfect for what im gonna do.