first post / corpse check

so i guess this is where i’m putting my thoughts now... 

on a website that looks like the dead rotting corpse of the internet dug itself out of the dirt and started breathing again.

good. i like that.

everything online feels sterilized. embalmed. 

people vacuum-sealed into personalities they can monetize. neat labels. therapeutic language. curated damage and dumb fucking opinions. a collection of the most unoriginal people performing “personhood” like it’s a product demo at a diddy concert. 

i don’t work like that. i never have. i don’t want to. 

i'd rather rot. slowly. privately. 

not for an audience. not for absolution. because that’s the honest process and fuck making you comfortable.

this blog isn’t a diary. it’s more like… residue. 

i’m trans. 

i’m exhausted.

i'm a demon apparently, sounds good to me

i like technology more than most people because it does what it’s told and doesn’t pretend to care just so it can disappoint you or suck you dry. 

i don’t like people. 

if you like me, it is because you are like me. 

if i let you near me, it’s because you are broken in a compatible way. 

i live somewhere between dead internals, metal walls, and the part of your brain that won’t shut the fuck up at 2:37am. this is a place for thoughts i don’t want optimized. 

things that don’t need engagement metrics or a moral at the end. 

sometimes it’ll be jokes. 

sometimes it’ll be anger. 

sometimes it’ll just be me staring at the wall and typing anyway.

if that sounds dramatic, good. 

life is fucked. 

pretending otherwise is the real cringe...

if you’re here to lurk, welcome.
if you’re here to judge, go fuck yourself. or at least be interesting about it.
if you’re here because you feel a little out of place everywhere else, yeah. same.

more later. or not.

this isn’t a promise.

- me