a chilly (congested) monday morning

i dont read. well, i do... however the most reading i will do every year will be either a fanfiction with a 100k+ word count, or a Wikipedia article on some obscure random topic i decided to fixate on for the day. the last book i read was in highschool even though i never had bothered to complete the books assigned to me for English assignments. and yes i think it is fair of me to say that i am a little ashamed by that fact. i like book people and it would be nice to be a book person as well. It's just a little hard for me to get into stuff like that- its the same reason why i dont watch as many television shows as the average person does.... too many options to choose from, about fictional stories that have a 50/50 chance of being well written pieces of storytelling. why bother investing time into such a thing, i would think to myself, when i could be reading fanfics of my favorite characters in a universe im already well familiar with on ao3. too much effort for me to care.....

despite it all, i have gotten real interested in the hobby lately. so for the last 48 hours i have made a plan for myself to read at least 5 books this year. Which okay might not be a lot but its a lot for me for sure. i have a list of books i'd like to read, and a library card that has not been used since 2022, and a dream. this list of books, of course, largely consisting of highly rated sapphic romance novels i found on reddit and tiktok. as well as books i found by searching 'books that will destroy you' because. i just have been in a mood okay. 

i am sickly and my brain is woozy and my nose stings from a runny nose and i am awfully sleepy. but the completionist in me cannot wait to finish this book. ebooks are a gift to this world did you know that? audiobooks too, though i'm not sure which one i prefer yet. heres to me hopefully improving my english while simultaneously enhancing my intellectual abilities through   queer literature. !!!!!!!!!!!!!