Words

Okay so like this just happened today. 

CONTEXT:  MY SCHEDULE IS SO CRAZY NOW out of 7 days a week I only have ONE free day bc every other day ends late AND I HAVE TUITION 4 DAYS IN A ROW WTF (Thurs to Sunday) so you can imagine since 2026 JUST started this schedule is taking quite the toll on me

This week I have had 0 free days because Wednesday had something after school which I forgot and Wednesday is SUPPOSED to be my only free day BUT THEN SMTH CAME UP IN SCHOOL so this week every day just ends late WTF

So today I had already planned to skip tuition because I literally cannot take it anymore like I can't do anything after school today or like I might actually jump. And I totally forgot that I had some leadership training today too. And the teacher in charge is highkey scary- like he gives gong too in squid game like it's that every presence of he seems nice yet yk he gonna crash out any time. So after school  I had to talk to him, and even after I told him all my mental struggles and my personal situation he still said like "once you have made a commitment you should stick to it, not just say 'I commit to this' then let go of it' 'this is the LAST time I am excusing you for this'like it's not like I MEANT to skip training like that like I already told him how bad I have been doing and I don't know why his words like are messing with my head-currently I feel so guilty for being so weak that I had to skip leadership training, like I'm beating myself up right now and I hate myself right now. And on top of that he made me call my dad over this and I didn't even want to tell my dad about my struggles I wanted to keep this to myself! Like I'm actually so scared of this teacher someone save me I want to die