I need to be better

Last year I haven't been my best. I messed up a lot last year. Personal wise, Online, and even in person I messed up. School, Work. I messed up so much.

I wanna change. I wanna be a better person.

This year I want to better person and not mess up. I want to be the person I want to be! I want to live a good life. I am going to work for it and get to it. I am writing this so at the end of this year, I can reflect on my progress. I want to be better than I am. Here are some personal goals of mine.

• I want to be fit, I don't see myself how I image, Plus I am very weak. So it's best for me to work out and be better with my body.
• I wanna be better at school. So far I been good (getting B in my classes) but I can do better. Right now I am lacking a bit. So I hope I can learn more and do better. It's hard for me. I can't really focus, I have a hard time doing so. I can to improve and focus better so I can do better in school
• I wanna be a good person. I don't feel like I been kind to my friends. I want to more and treat them better. I just sit there and listen to them and talk to them about their interest. I want to be more than just a listener. I want to make my friends and other people happy. I want to be a fun person not just a random person you can go to when no on else is online. I feel alone and it kinda hurts when people do that. I want to be better person than then that. And on the topic of that I also want to be more social. I am in so many friend groups and discord servers and I barley talk. I gotta be be more social, Talk to people and get to know them. And make more friends! I might be taking this too far. But I at least want to be social enough that I am able to talk to random people without freaking out. I get really scared when talking to people I don't know. Even if they work at a burger shop and I will never see them again in my life. I shouldn't be so scared just to talk.
• I wanna show my personality and interest. For a really long time I been hiding my interest and what I like. This is because of my parents. They hate what I like so I have to hide it just so they don't yell at me. But I ended up hiding it from the public too. A lot of people don't know what I like. So they have to guess and throw stuff at me just to find out. It's weird. So what I wanna do is open up about what I like. What I want to do is first. I wanna wear scene because I have a big interest in that. And I also like cosplaying so I might wear something from my cosplays too. Next, I wanna show people what I like from decorating some of my stuff. So far I made a bunch of stickers for my laptop. But I wanna make some more stickers just to show. Like for my water bottle, or pins for my backpack. I been hiding my interest for so long. I wanna show people what I like and also hope I find people with the same interest. I see people do the same and they look cool. I wanna do the same. I hope that I am able to show what I like to people without saying anything!
• I wanna get stuff done! I have always never got stuff done! It's hard for me to do them. I keep getting side track with something else. In school I always end up drawing something on my paper instead of doing my work. Or even for personal projects (fortaken, interdeep, and the biggest one my game hazzy) when I try to work on them I keep getting distracted and end up doing something else. I don't know what do to about it. I wanna learn how to keep myself in track and do the stuff and finish it! Like I haven't touch hazzy for a long time because I been grinding in kaiju paradise. nonstop, and for interdeep I haven't even touch it, all the planing is still in the notebook i wrote it in. I really need to find a way to get stuff done!
• I want to get better at drawing (and maybe more). For a really long I am not good at drawing. It doesn't look good, And my art style is bad. I want to improve on my drawing! I been drawing a lot in hopes I made progress. Which I did, It looks better now. But I still want to be better. I want to find a good art style and also make good artwork like all the other artist I follow/like. I want to be as good as them. So I am going to be drawing more. In hopes I can be better at drawing! I will try to post them so people can see the progress I made and showcase all of my cool artwork. I want to be a cool artist and be better at drawing than how I was. Also I want to get myself into animation. I been obsessed with animation memes again and animation music videos. I used to like that stuff back in like 2018, 2019 and 2020. I stopped liking it after a bunch of people left the community due to drama. In 2024 I found them again, and they are back and also I found a bunch of other cool creators too. I am in love of animation memes again! I want to start making them again (i used to make a few). I will combine my drawings and new art style with animations and make animation memes and animation music videos.