I'M BACK IN THE FUCKING BUILDING AGAIN!!!

I was lying.

Haikyuu was NOT the cure for whatever is wrong with my brain. Since the winter break started i haven't been able to LIVE even tho it was my MAIN PRIORITY THIS TIME!! I really try to do stuff with myself but after i wake up (mostly around 1pm btw) i have no energy for ANYTHING and when I feel like i could physically do something, my brain just tells me "nuh uh, we'll do it later, now you have to do something else" but when i actually WANT TO DO THAT "SOMETHING ELSE" SUDDENLY MY BRAIN CHANGES TO "Hmm, yk what? What if we just take a LITTLE break from doing nothing and start scrolling through our phone?" ... please kill me or smth B[   Well to be fair it's not like i fight with myself about my will to do stuff, come on! Laying in bed all day sounds beautiful especially when you have to do thousands of other stuff that day and the moment you wake up is the moment where you already think about the finish. I feel so fucking lost i swear, it's like my brain is a mush but at the same time I AM AWARE THAT I'M LAZY. I heard somewhere that psychologist don't believe that people can be just "lazy" and there's always a deeper meaning to it but sometimes i just feel like the main character and think to myself "maybe i am the one, the first one!"

Uuugh, i don't even know what to do atp, maybe i'll just list EVERY little thing that i have to do in the morning and start crossing them out, maybe that will feel less overwhelming. 

If anyone has any ideas on to how to cure lazyness PLEASE i'm begging (T__T) /\