love love love ~

Why should I love him, in the end?

It’s a question that comes back to me quite often in my head, but I suppose he’s the first person who ever truly cared about me in this world. And the worst part is that it was out of pity (at least that’s how I feel). But time eventually made it so that he no longer regretted that gesture.

The problem is that our love isn’t reciprocal, to the point that even if I weren’t in love, I would still love him in such an inconsiderate, overwhelming way. In fact, that’s what I was doing before I fell madly in love with him.

We’re not a couple, but we both know perfectly well that we are soulmates. The problem is our age: it’s just as strange for me as it is for him for a romantic relationship to form between a 17-year-old girl (I’ll be 17 in three months) and a 20-year-old young man.

A four-year age gap is not something to ignore. It isn’t problematic as long as it’s moral. I mean, why would a man who is just beginning his life be interested in a high school girl?

It’s sad—very sad—and the problem is that I’m the only one who suffers from it.

If it’s only a matter of patience, then it will be fine. After all, besides waiting, what else could I do? I am madly in love, and the only outcome of this love is to kill me alive. (lmao)

You know, he has a personality that made me become a better person from the moment I met him, calming my hypersensitivity. But it also somewhat increased my emotional dependence, even though now I understand that dependence better.

He has few flaws, and it’s true that they hurt me deeply, but he’s the first person I can forgive without regret. That is, he never stops doing good things for me, so a few mistakes can’t make him a bad person.

I will never be able to see him as a truly bad person.
But when I’m hurt, it’s true that for about an hour I wonder why I should love him — though it usually comes from my hypersensitivity .. #loser

This man is a mix of big brother, soulmate, and the man I want to spend my life with.

I’ve never had this kind of connection with anyone. It was so insane. It was a friendly love at first sight, where I understood that it was by his side that I wanted to spend my life — but not necessarily in a romantic way.

And he felt it too. Everything was mutual, until August. And it’s entirely his fault that I ended up falling in love with him, because he gave me more than he was supposed to give me.

He told me that we were connected, whether romantically or through a bond of brotherhood, that in every universe we were linked. And I believe him, because it’s true.

His soul completes mine, and my soul completes his.

I love him so much that I could cry. I would give him my life, all my attention — everything.          It’s been six months now that I’ve been madly in love. It’s the first time that I don’t want to stop loving a man just because it isn’t reciprocal.

I love him, and that is absolutely all that matters. When he loves me with that same intensity, then his love will be all that matters to me.

anyways, it doesn’t matter,