I can't stand myself and everyone

Nobody loves me, i think it's okay,i barely do anything in my house besides cleaning my dogs piss and washing plates,add that i barely socialize with my family or anyone i only chat with my online friends,i'm not worth loving or caring and honestly i feel disgusted at the idea of myself being in a relationship,maybe if i was a better person and beautifull i wouldn't feel like this, i don't deserve it,i don't deserve anything,makes me feel like a mean spoiled brat with no manners,many people had to work hard to buy something they always wanted, while me just sat in my room doing nothing,waithing for my christmas gift to arrive,i'm a shame to myself, fifthteen and still don't know how to pay for something or cook,i don't understand how my father feels proud of me,i'm ugly and dumb,i barely talk to him and yet he's nice with me,i don't get it,why would you be proud of someone so useless ?, or maybe he's just pretending because i don't get it.

My family can't stand me either,they know i'm useless too,more my older sister and mother,i got called useless sometimes in the past,i'm allergic to that word now i think, it triggers me,sometimes they insult me but never apologize after even knowing sometimes they're wrong they never apologize,my sisters think i'm cringe and emo (i'm not a emo but they think someone is emo when they're sad or negative idk why) i think the most nicest person to me is my father and my pup oh and my friends ofc.

so i'm basiclly unlikeable i guess no one in my family understands me even tho they're my family and they should be the first ones to understand and help me, i don't help too much either so i guess i don't really deserve that help,they have their own problems and i shouldn't be thinking of myself always.

i don't want to make this look like i'm a "victim" and they're abusing me or something, it's just minor problems i'll be fine.