grief

Last night someone in my family died,me and my cousin talked about it,neither of us were close to that person cuz we're not close to our family,only with each other,i hated visiting that side of our family for various reasons.It took me a whiile to realise im never gonna see that person again and that neither me or my cousin got to see him one last time,we wont be able to attend the funeral either.Are we both hypocrites ? or maybe its just me,we constantly both talk trash about our relatives.