tiny bit sad rn

because today me and my friends were joking and saying stuff like "(person) is my favourite person!!" "oh yeah? Well (person) is my favourite person" and like I don't have a best friend and I haven't for a while because of stuff with my old best friend:(( which is kinda sad because like I'm no one's favourite person, me and my sister aren't on speaking terms so I haven't been close with her for months, and I dropped out of school so there's sort of a big barrier between me and people I feel, and I already struggle socially so extra barriers are not what I need :'[

this isn't hate to my friends btw,, I don't blame them for not being my best friend or anything, it's kinda my fault for dropping out, I made socialising harder for myself