Happy Anniversary to Us*

Happy Anniversary to Us*

I held it in my hand! My ticket to the grand fourteenth anniversary celebration of Blogophilia at Martian Towers.**  I’m so excited!  I barely participate, but they keep inviting me anyways.  The Blogophiliacs are a bunch of swell people.  My mind raced back to the time I celebrated with them on the fourth anniversary celebration.  (Wow, that was ten years ago.  I really need to participate more.)  I remember taking four shots of tequila, I ate four donuts, and took the stairs four steps at a time.  I couldn’t help but think repeating those events with fourteen might not be too healthy.

I glanced up at the clock.  Holy smokes!  It was almost the fourteenth hour.  I needed to get a move on.  I didn’t want to be too fashionably late.  I had just walked out the door, when it hit me.  Drinking those fourteen hundred ounces of liquid sugar cola had been a horrible idea.  I needed to run back in the house and use the restroom right away.   Oh, I picked a bad day to wear these fourteen button trousers. It took me fourteen seconds too long to make it to the restroom in time and then another fourteen minutes to take a quick shower and put on another outfit.

I arrived to Martian Towers fifteen minutes late. (If I lived in a perfect world, I would have gotten there a minute earlier.) I caught the elevator. The celebration was on the fourteenth floor.***  I was going to do at this party everything a fourteen-year-old likes to do.  I was going to spend time with friends, play games, and if they had cake, I was going to eat cake!**** If they had cake, should I eat fourteen pieces, or would that be overkill?

At the party, I did fourteen of my most favorite things.  They had a kiddie pool filled with pudding. I can’t believe I lost to Lika in a pudding wrestling match! There were horsy rides on the fourteenth floor. Dia brought the horse and even though I didn’t thing the horse should have been drinking all that whiskey, he still managed to five a heck of a ride.  Jay was in charge of the indoor bon fire.  What could go wrong?  Christine was in charge of the wine.  That seemed right!  Lots of other people were doing lots of other stuff, but I don’t have the patience to mention fourteen people in this story.  Although I will mention that Irene killed in in karaoke!  Born to be wild, indeed.

The highlight of the party was when Martian Towers blasted off into space.  Sometimes I tend to forget that Marvin is a Martian and that he likes to do stuff like that. We left a solar system.  We blew up a planet or two.  Marvin is a big fan of the Earth shattering kabooms.  Of course. he only blew up uninhabited planets.  Marvin likes an explosion, but he’s no monster. However, we did get in trouble with the Venusian space force. (Who knew the Venusians had a space force?)  Apparently, you cant go around blowing up planets without a permit.  Oopsy!

When we landed, I think most of us were a little toasted.  I think someone might have spiked the punch.  I’ll confess that I was more than just a little toasted.  I had fourteen glasses. The rest of the night was a little bit of a blur.

So, how did I end up here in the hospital anyway? Do I really need to take all fourteen of these pills?  What was that?  The celebration happened fourteen days ago?  How long have I been out?  There’s a video on Youtube?  No, I don’t remember putting on a toga.  When did I kiss the horse? Is it me or are you going blurry every now and then? Oh my, my head is really ringing.  I guess I better rest up.  Before you know it we’re going to be celebrating fifteen years and I want to be ready, because were going to be wild for that celebration!

* It’s the topic. A topical anniversary if you will.

** Martian Towers is the obvious choice for any celebration.

*** It took a lot of finagling to move the celebration up one floor every year.  Last year the accounting department felt quite unlucky indeed.

**** The US spent a fourteen million dollars in Costa Rica on a study that indicates fourteen-year-olds love doing all that stuff.  Congress slipped it in some sort of relief bill in which Americans were going to get a buck and a quarter.  Every little bit helps right?