Learning Beauty, Style, and Hair the Quiet Way

I feel like I am in this in-between stage of life where I am still figuring out who I am. I already know what I am drawn to. My life is like this now. I am new to the beauty and fashion lifestyle. Not in a dramatic way, just slowly and intentionally. 🤍

I like watching makeup videos. I also like saving ideas. Sometimes I imagine what my personal style could look like one day, even if I cannot fully express my style yet. I am still trying to figure out my style and the beauty and fashion lifestyle.

My parents are a part of the reason for this. My parents want me to be like everyone. My parents think it is better to keep things simple. They like it when I wear clothes and do not do much to my looks. My parents think this is the way to be. I know why my parents think this way, but it is hard for me. I do not want to be like everyone. I want to be myself. I do not want to be too crazy or weird. I just want to be different from everyone, in my own way. My parents and their ideas are making it hard for me to do that. These people are really in control of everything. It might sound weird, but I think they are really great. I love my parents very much. They are still awesome to me. 🤍

I have to keep everything key because of that. My makeup has to be really soft and natural. I wear clothes that’re not too revealing. My hairstyles have to look neat and put together all the time. I am always trying to express my personality in ways that are quiet and still fit, within the boundaries of makeup, clothes, and hairstyles. I want to express my personality in the way I do my makeup, the clothes I wear, and the hairstyles I have.

Makeup hasn’t been one of the easiest things to explore so far. I keep it light and simple—nothing bold, just subtle touches that make me feel more confident. I like learning how small details can change how you feel without changing who you are. My parents tell me I’m not allowed to go out or that I have to remove my makeup if it's too dramatic!! I know contact lenses really do finish the make up but that's something I really cannot commit to which is also because of my parents.

Fashion is what I think about the most. I really like putting together outfits. My parents like simple clothes. They like tops and plain jeans. They do not like anything that stands out much. On the other hand, I like wearing lots of layers, long skirts, and cardigans. I like clothes with textures. I like outfits that look like I put thought into them. I prefer not to wear clothes that reveal a lot of skin. I just want my clothes to feel like they are really mine, like a fashion statement. Fashion is very important to me. I want my clothes to be a part of who I am, like my own personal fashion.

Hair is definitely the hardest part of everything. 

I am trying to learn how to style my hair. It is really frustrating. I do not really know how to tease my hair, and even when I try to tease my hair, my hair never turns out right. My curls are another thing that I struggle with. My curls look good for a time, and then my curls fall flat, or my curls lose their shape completely. Hair feels like such a part of your overall look, and not being able to control my hair yet makes everything feel unfinished. I do use hair products like heat-protecting spray and strong-hold hair spray for my hair. I have curling irons and a hair straightener. I just cannot figure out easy ways to style my hair. I mean, I have these curling irons and this hair straightener. Doing my hair is still a big problem for me. I want to find ways to do my hair with my curling irons and hair straightener. 

I remind myself that I am new to this thing. It is okay that I do not know everything about this thing now. I am learning about this thing quietly. I am growing at my own pace. I am also figuring out how to stay true to myself while I am still respecting my parents. This thing is new to me. I am taking my time to understand it.

If anyone reading this has suggestions, I will really appreciate them. Are there any brands that are not fast fashion, still modest but interesting? I want to build my style with the affordable brands that are not fast fashion, slowly and thoughtfully, without feeling like I have to rush or blend in completely with the affordable brands that are not fast fashion.

🤍