alone on new years

this is the first new years eve that i'm going to be alone. my boyfriend and i aren't fully together anymore and too much happened in the last weeks for us to be together today. it angers me that he doesn't really want to, but i need to respect his feelings. 

and like last year i'm sick - i don't know how the fuck i'm sick again exactly on this date like last year. so i can't even go out and i don't even really want to because i'm sad that me and him are not spending it together even though we hang out almost every second day. 

my mom is going out with her friends and my brother too.. my grandparents live near me but i don't even want to go there and because my cat, moji, will be alone. 

what are you guys doing today?