new blog alert

im kinda using this to vent a little about my life, recently i saw my ex family post their holiday pictures and i saw him included its so weird to wonder if he is seeing someone new too i wouldnt be sad but im curious its very crazy to think i was going to have a life with this person and now im thankful i wont be.. no i dont wish the best for him actually but i dont wallow in these types of feelings, whatever happens to him i dont mind.. hes like a stranger now. 

i signed up for school again u know they say its never to late ik im still young but ill be 22 in march and i feel my youth fading away lol its a little depressing to think of me getting older i want to be young forever this might seem superficial but its because i dont want to look older im already insecure as it is and seeing myself age only makes it worse i need to learn to embrace aging but its hard. 

alot happened this year and im excited to start fresh in the new year alot of new things are in my life, a boyfriend, school, a new car, moving out its like a whole new plot. this past year i was in a horrible relationship that has taught me alot on how to be a better person like being less obsessive, jealous, controlling, and emotional, i want to better myself in all these areas for my new relationship because he is so nice to me he deserves the best from me too.