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i like writing, and i don't know if i'm good at it tbh. so this is why i'm making this blog about short povs from different charcters i made while writing or drawing!
so here's the first one:
subject: eating disorder.
“I wish i had your body.”
are some words i never though i will hear from someone. saying it to ME.
and some words i never though i will hate.
some words i never though will disgust me this much.
then i opened our conversation,
“i wish i had your body”
i couldn’t say anything, i just stared at my phone with disgust. not knowing from what exactly, my body?or maybe just your words. well i guess both.
i stare at the mirror, and i suddenly see the kid inside me, her brain filled with their words. “you got fatter” “are you really gonna eat all that?” “wait, is this big thing really your stomach?” “you should really watch what you’re eating” “you’re so fat, its becoming disgusting.”
why should a 10 years old girl should have this much hate?
why did a 10 years old girl had to reduce the food she eat to the point where she stopped eating food at all, to the point where eating became disgusting.
every.bite.gave.me.another.reason.to.vomit.
well at least i had a goal in life,
be skinny.
and that’s what they call me now.
but no matter what.its never enough.
i want to lose more weight.
i want to be skinnier.
“you’re already skinny” “you’re so thin” “you should eat more, you look like a skeleton.”
no,i’m not. no i’m not going to eat more.
as long as i’m not satisfied.
sometime i wish i could give people my eyes so they could understand.
i’m not an attention seeker, this is just what i see.
my body is the thing i hate the most.
so no, you don’t want it, i promise you.
but it’s okey for you to say that
i guess we always want what we don’t have.
every one have a different point of view anyway.
and this is mine.
i hope you liked it
see you next time for another one!
-daphe-
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