buge(s) (green)

instead of studying for my calc final that is in 7 hours, i will instead write about things on this weird website! 

i think things are crazy. 

like isnt it a little nuts how weird our situation is as humans?? we are animals, and we evolved to be smart instead of having giant teeths or something, and we are the only species we know of that can think about thinking and do metacognition and whatever. but how do we know that we are the only ones? just literally 100,000 years ago spoken language was thought to have been widely used. that is estimated to be less than a third of the time that humans have existed, period, and an infinitesimal fraction of the time htat whatever rendition of the ancient humans that came before us existed.

point being, we had no way to communicate what we were feeling, or develop it in any way and I think thats insane considering how many other relatively intelligest organisms we know of just on our small tiny dot in the solar system.

like octopuses, they can open jars! and like you have to wonder what theyre actually thinking. do they have coherent trains of thought or is it just reponses to external stimuli? like a flower will turn towards the sun, but does that mean its thinking about it? is the octupus really trying to get open the jar with the knowledge of what will come next or is it just acting out of instinct?? 

and what about memory? what if a tiny green bug can have complete coherence of thought, every bit of conciousness crystal clear, but its tiny brain can only remember it for like 1 second? like at that point its just memory span that defines "conciousness". how do we know the octopus isnt having its own form of conscious thought, but just doesnt store the memories long term? or doesnt hav ea way to communicate or develpo those thoughts, like early humans? this is why i am always nice to worms.

idk i think life and brains and shit is crazy. this is why i will soon drop out of college and become friends with some bugs and live in the forest. 

that is all :)