Recent Happenings 𐔌՞. .՞𐦯

I've started packing for my winter break trip, I'm gonna be back home for a whole month. We leave tomorrow, and I've basically already put everything away except for heavier items + carry on bag. I'm bringing my cat with me though, and it's a bit difficult because I'm always carrying so many things. 

I'm superrrr siked to see my sister, friends, family and pets. But I'm also dreading it a bit. Things have gotten so tense between me and my dads relationship, but I don't think he realizes it because I never show it when he calls. It's weird though. I've started having these moments that feel like I'm suddenly on the verge of suffocating but I never do stop breathing. I'll lay in bed and put this perfume on that smells comforting to me, on my wrists, then lay there with my hands tucked beneath my head. 

My best friends birthday is soon ! I have a gift I've wanted to make her for yearsss. I think I'll do it this year, when I get there, because I didn't have enough time to go down to the free sewing machines they set up every weekend at the library. We have matching pjs we joke about, but I wanna make us real matching pjs with a matching stuffed animal for her. 

My other best friend is graduating !! I'm so proud of her. Something I use every day is a blender I recently got. I debated even bringing it, because homemade iced capps...mhmm...So I got her a new one for when she moves out for grad school.

Still, I have lots of gift ideas I have to get to when I get there. For christmas. Plus I'm severely lacking on gifts for my sister and my cousin, whos birthday passed recently. I thought of buying stroopwafels too for everyone, but I'll probably be too lazy to go walk there before my flight tomorrow. 

Me and my pj friend are going to do a game jam. We've been talking a lot about our careers, being stuck in limbo. It's perfect for us-I'll do the drawing, which is part of my whole issue on lacking on effort in art. And she'll do the coding and sciencey stuff, because shes been questioning her path on what to do after her studies. 

I went to a shop yesterday. It healed the edgelord within me, but nothing was below 100. I need a job before I can even consider spending any more money. I did thrift superrr cute new jeans ! With cute pockets and low rise !! I was super lucky because it's hard to find something like that in my size at the thrift, since I'm chubby. 

Finally decorated my room a bit more a couple of weeks ago. It doesnt feel like home though. 

My genshin arc is so back. OG Dottore luvr.