tupac back.

thurs, dec 11 ‘25 @ 7:49pm

after getting my previous blog account on here banned in the summer, i didn’t want to make another account like that on here. i threw my hands up in defeat and walked away, but after some thought and by thought i mean having a few mental issues and by mental issues i mean; it’s become harder to keep my true emotions and feelings on things locked down in the basement.

i decided to open a new account so i can vent my craziness! yay! i am back! antgutz is so back, but i have to become png-13 or else my acc will get banned AGAIN. so, i will be censoring words like a p ussy… i wonder if that works as a censorship. hm.. what about pssy… no that reads more as pissy… pus*sy ? lol no no… pus*y ? ew no.

i’ll figure it out, just needs a little faith and pixie dust! 

anywho, guess i don’t need to put any updates from my blogs from my previous account because it’s not like anyone remembers me. let’s start fresh then!

well, a* texted me a bit ago saying he wants to go to up to san fran like right then and there. i was dumbfounded like um it’s 7pm and i’m in the middle of making my dinner (spicy cheesy ramen #yummerz). 

i told him to relax and that we should go tomorrow, he agreed so that’s on the agenda for tomorrow. usually my best friend, p*, and i watch the new episodes of goddess bless you from death on friday’s, however they recently got employed so now it’s moved to saturday’s. 

sometimes, i feel like a* is starting become into me. i know this is a huge part of my npd, assuming people have crushes on me but i genuinely do think he’s starting to like me in that regard. 

however, the normal part of my brain says we’re just becoming closer friends like best friends almost. which is strange because i do nothing for him, he does everything for me. 

it’s quite one sided in that way, but i do appreciate him a lot but would i still be as close with him if he stopped buying me things, taking me places, hanging out, lending me things? the answer is leaning toward most not likely. 
ugh, there’s depth to the way i view my friends through a mentally ill lens. we’ll discuss that later, put a pin it< >