1. First blog anyways let’s go deep and talk about being feminine while having an illness

WOAHH first blog EVER??? Heh.. I’m so cool..

Uh yeah ok anyways the topic today is being feminine while having an illness (not like cold or a fever or some shit like an actual illeness)

Maybe it’s just me but it felt impossible when I was younger to be feminine when I’m constantly being “repaired”. Not to mention, growing up with misogyny constantly surrounding me, I saw any part of femininity as weak or fragile (obviously not anymore). I didn’t want to be weak. I had to be strong. If I couldn’t be strong, how could I keep my family happy while going through illness? How could I fight it if I was weak? 

I avoided any sense of femininity like it was a plague and the few feminine things I did like, I hid away and felt ashamed of as if it was some sort of addiction. My desire to be strong eventually led to me thinking I was trans.

It’s ironic how as I got older I eventually became obsessed with being feminine, even worrying that I wasn’t feminine enough. A total 180 on my part. 

Ok anyways the end I just wanted to talk about this in case someone else is struggling with this or something