I miss the rats at my school (very long rant about my life)

unsure whether or not to put this under the pets and animals category or the school/college/university category. I almost wish i could choose both. i am high so i apologize if this gets off topic and is rant-y. no, we do not have a rat infestation at my school. i attend a technical school for animal related careers. we have a bunch of different animal species at my school, but we have fancy rats. funny enough, rats are not my favorite animal. if you’ve seen my profile, i’m aware that this is my second post about rats. i also have rats as my profile photo. even at my school, i happened to be associated with rats by both the other students and teachers in my classroom. i’ve gained the title “rat expert” and the “rat guy” by my peers unintentionally. even my therapist associates me with them (and reptiles, but that’s a different rant). i have a special interest in animals (in general) and i have a dream of pursuing a career surrounding animals in the future. i lack a favorite animal due to my special interest, i really like them all in their own way. the reason why this happened isn’t because i like rats specifically (even tho rats ARE awesome ok?), it’s because i originally felt an instant attachment to this one rat at my school. he was the offspring of two other rats from the classroom next door, not sure what they did with his siblings but he was by himself. (they were in the middle of looking for more rats and a friend for him). i’m unsure what made this rat so special but it was an  connection. i would think about him every day and get honestly jealous when other people would handle him. i would get really upset at the fact that he couldn’t be mine. i did not want another rat LIKE him, i wanted him. a lot of those feelings i still hold today, except ive gotten mostly better with jealousy. i held him every single day. rats grow and get real big real fast (most likely having to do with the fact they only live for like 2-3 years. it’s the reason a lot of laboratories use rats for testing.) over the past three months i’ve watched him grow up from the littlest thing to close to looking like an adult rat. my constant handling was a huge factor in why he’s so socialized and friendly now with many people. i was pretty much the only person in class who would handle him. the other people who did hold him never appreciated him like i do. they would pick him up like a little kid trying to gross out their friends. “EWW GET HIM OFF OF ME GET HIM OFF OF ME! STAWPP IT RATS ARE DISGUSTING. EW WHAT A LITTLE FREAK!!!” it would make me mad. no one liked him like i do. he started with hanging out on my shoulder while i did my work. he would sometimes crawl down my arms and behind my neck when feeling active. he eventually started tucking himself into my scrub top (i always had an undershirt on). it felt weird at first but i let him and now i really enjoy it. he will stay latched onto my chest/stomach, sit on my lap in my shirt, or sit on my shoulder and peak his little head out. people think im weird for having a rat in my shirt, DONT CARE!!! he is the highlight of my school day! people mention how i seem to be his favorite. they ask me for help. they ask me for rat advice as if im an expert. they know that if they’re handling him while im around that he’s going to jump on my shoulders and not want to go back to them. some only just realized his awesomeness and didn’t care for him a few months ago. FUCKING POSERS!! POSERS!! three months in, he got a friend!!! he was a little younger/smaller then the original rat was. he was way more skittish. but i was SO happy he got a friend and it made him SO happy. rats are social animals and need atleast 1 friend or more! i would find them cuddling every morning after that! i got his friend’s trust by hand-feeding him treats every time i saw him. i am not as attached to him as the first rat but i really love him in his own way nonetheless. i had signed up beginning of the year to pet-sit the first rat during the few days we did not have school during thanksgiving weekend. now that the second rat was here, i was so excited to pet-sit two rats instead! my plan was to get him to fully trust me when i have more one on one time with him in a quiet environment. i took both of them home and it worked!! the first rat already prefers me over any other students but then he started allowing me to pet him and he would lay on my lap and relax! he’s never done that before then! and the second rat started to fully trust me as well. before then, we were only up to the point where he wasn’t scared being near me but freaked when i tried to pick him up. he is no longer scared of me handling him. they were such wonderful company. i don’t even care that they shit and pissed in my bed! i cleaned it!! by the time i had to give them back i know i made great progress with both of them and the second rat now hangs out in my scrub shirt as well. though, giving them back made me very upset. i now know what it would be like to have them at my home every day and i no longer have that. i still visit them at my school but it’s nothing like what i had that weekend. i miss my boys. they’re nothing like my babies that passed away but they’re amazing in their own individual way. new personalities. i dread the day that i graduate from the class and get my certificate of completion, i will miss them. i already do. i am sure that everyone in my life is tired of hearing me talk about them even if they would never say anything to me.