two jobs and im in hell

lord help me. i feel like this whole two job thing is finally catching up to me, ive held both jobs for about four months now and im really starting to feel the effects of it. one is night shift (8:50pm-7am) and the other is day shift (ranging anywhere between 8am till 6pm to 11am till 4pm). 

its affecting my work performance at both jobs too. 

last night (or was it the night before. these days just blend together) i had some teens come in to eat and they had both commented that i looked tired. i said i work two jobs and one is in the daytime and this one is at night. their next question was "when do you sleep?", which i answered with a "when i have a day off", but really i dont know when i sleep. i sleep for like three hours before coming into work at my other job, four if im lucky to leave my night job early. However their next comment was "ohhh so you're hustlin'"

which made me wonder like. why am i hustling. what is the purpose of me doing any of this shit. i dont have anything dire to pay off. i dont have anything to really like. show for me working this hard. 

yeah im paying off a car to my grandparents but im almost to 2k (the price they sold it to me for was 3k) and it really shouldnt take long for me to pay off the rest of it regardless. i pay 55 for my phone bill and my car insurance is like 250. my brother handles the power bill and even then its only 177 per month or some shit for both houses. 

i think once im done paying off my car im gonna quit waffle hell and go full time at the tea place. i hate that i dont get paid on a set date but i get paid so. im gonna get another job somewhere else maybe. BOOKSAMILLION FUCKING HIRE ME PLEASE.

anyway thats enough ranting im at work rn and i gotta start closing up. i hope someone runs me over brah