Disintegration

There's something that happens, when I listen to disintegration by the cure, it's like I can feel my heart, like a phantom limb, it's missing and it's because of him.

There's something that happens when listen to disintegration by the cure, and I don't think that song would make me feel that way if I didn't know him.

He's lingering on every lyric, drowning in the melody, kissing every beat, stubbornly hidden behind the vocals, making it all about him.

It's all I hear, it's all I feel, from the first note it resonates in my chest, this song sounds as if he was looking at me, when the rhythm starts he's so close to me it's almost unbearable, suffocating.But it doesn't stop, the music is only starting, his hands are so gentle they feel like feathers, my skin prickles at his touch, my lips begging to kiss every part of him, my fingers are tangling in his dark hair, he's smiling against me, his breathing is slow and so is mine, we're so close, so close I have to look away, he's right there, in this moment with me, all I want, all I've wanted for so long finally inches away from me.

Nothings scary, or feels unfamiliar, it's all so easy.I don't need to say anything, he understands, he feels it too.

It's all happening.

Like I've wanted for so long.

I'm not scared to mess it up, I'm not scared, he doesn't make me feel like there's anything to be afraid of, he's there, I don't wonder where he went, he's there.

He's holding me so close I wish this moment would never end, all the noise stops, he finally sees it, that I've always loved him, he feels the same way.But suddenly disintegration ends and it's all ripped away from me.