Warning: Content about self harm, viewer discretion is advised or however they say it
So I was debating on putting this at the dreams and supernatural topic or the life topic but whatever. Hi by the way, I have exams and I'm staying up rn but it's alright since I already studiedᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
So sorry, but for the name of context I need to vent (kinda)
To get into it, I always considered myself a daydreamer, a few years ago (around when I was 10-11?) I used to get nightmares or just dreams everyday. It got to the point where I was too afraid to sleep at night because I already anticipated what would come next, and I grew paranoid of nightmares.
You see my dreams were a lot more advanced as time went on. I could talk to people, smell, even felt pain at instances, the barrier between reality and my counciousness were fading, like they were merging.
And at multiple times, I tried to get out of a dream using a method I always used when I wanted to call it quits, but i couldnt. I tried the method, I knew it was a dream, but I couldn't get out now matter how hard I tried. I even tried lucid dreaming (*where you're aware of the fact that you're dreaming, so you can control the dreamspace) and it just wouldn't change no matter what. I felt like I was trapped, helpess.
At other times, dreams felt like they stretched onto days, maybe even weeks. I recall living through a war, I thought it was a dream at first but with how long it went on, I slowly believed it was reality.
I already told my parents about it, and, well, they brushed it off (yeah Japan has a lot of issues so this is normal to them I guess), it went on like this for a few months, until one day it suddenly.. Stopped. The dreams, the nightmares it all stopped appearing one night.
But it was the withdrawal that hit harder, after the dreams stopped I became paranoid—loosing my sense of reality and the ability to differentiate between reality and dreams, I would talk with my family and friends about things that I thought they said, until they said they haven't said anything like the sort.
I would go into bathrooms and began scratching my legs until it was on the verge of bleeding, just to feel, to convince myself that this was reality, that I wasn't dreaming.
Honestly I thought my dreams were just a normal rite every child goes through, but now that Im looking at it it def sounds concerning. Are my dreams normal?
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M1sty?
It is possible to have very vivid dreams. But I would try to get some help for it if this is the effect it has on you, wether it is normal or not.