Exes and Exfriends

Hello! My name is Jam, im 19 and currently in college and this is ig a lil rant/gossip about my highschool friends/exes and even recent shit.

Currently im with the best guy in the whole entire would who honestly treats me like a queen and makes me feel safe even when i doubt it. He's a good man, and a very honest man. and im forever grateful for him and his parents and his friends for being so welcoming to me.

I want to start with my first ex who is actually fucking evil and i legit hope he does die or some shit cause he's disgusting and horrible (Extra info before i start: My current bf atm is actually my ex from 9th grade after when my evil ass ex made me break up with him, which was just 9th grade me being naive about my evil ex so yea also this took place 4 years ago atp but it does still haunt me and even in my current relationship). Lets just call my first ex by his actual name cause he is a horrible person and doesn't deserve happiness. Nick, my first ex in hs, we were friends for a while while dating my current bf at the time (my bf now) and eventually he does start using his manipulating tactics on me. Of course, im too naive about this cause i genuinely think he's pretty nice just very awkward. so i start discussing to nick how sometimes my current bf didn't listen to me (my current bf during that time did have issues listening cause he didn't know what he was doing and he was just a teen like me so yea, but he does treat me with a lot of respect and does listen to me now), and would just do wtv he wants, and he was like oh you should break up with him. ofc I listened and 2 weeks later, I did get with Nick (yes ik this was a reoccurring thing that will happen in this rant/gossip because tbh I didn't know better and tbh i was just a stupid 15 year old.). During my time dating Nick in the first few months, it was alr. His mom was nice, his dad was nice and tbh things were going well. ofc during this time i was having hard times with my mom and grandma especially that i wanted more freedom and wanted to do more. but also tbh i was just being a teen. Ofc he would comfort me with this and all that but after the 3 month mark it started getting weird and a bit more rough in my relationship too. Nick would often be very clingy and even like being more gradually sexual over the course of our relationship which tbh during that time I did have a sort of a hypersexuality which I hated. ofc things during this time were consensual until ofc it came towards him wanting to have sex with me. Around September it started to get worst especially that he would say hurtful things, trap me in the bathroom in the dark even though im scared of the dark, and even mentally hurt me. Around October, I decided to tell 2 friends about my situation and how i felt like just honestly ending my own life because of Nick. of course this was reported to the school and I landed in a mental ward. (I DID NOT BELONG THERE OMG. tbh if you want to be scared straight and all that, fucking never go into a mental ward./gen) Now during this time, Nick also got sent there too cause he was threatening to harm himself. When I did get out, I told some close friends where me and Nick went because they were genuinely curious and I don't like lying. So , when he gets out and one day me, his mom and him were in the car, she starts yelling at me cause i told his friends as well cause they were worried for him and apparently those friends told their parents too. so ofc im absolutely sad and feel guilty. While going back to my apartment, Nick starts like pushing me into the 2nd floor wall, getting up all in my face especially calling me hurtful things and such. Some months pass by, from October to December, Nick starts physically hurting me, applying pressure to my s3x life saying "everyone else is doing it why not us." (im 15 mind you. I didn't want to lose my vcard in fucking 10th grade.). Of course, I have no one to go to, I can't tell my friends cause I was 'scared they'll ask nick or tell their parents which will get told to his mom and than to nick. same thing went for my parents as well. I was fucking mortified. I couldn't leave cause I was to scared he would lowkey end my life which he has gone to a point where he tried stabbing me with his butterfly knife comb. which resulted to his mom hearing me cry and i had to lie to her that it was my mom and me arguing again which is why i was crying. nick was also making sure I lied so he didn't get in trouble.  any who, around new years eve, he was pressuring already now for 2 weeks about having s3x with him. and i was like no im too young and im not ready. but he kept pressuring me and pressuring me saying he would break up with me and all that and unfortunately, I did give in. I didn't like it at all tbh and just forced myself to say i liked it even though it made me feel disgusting. And than he started saying oh i need to take plan b cause ofc we didn't do it with protection. and to be fair, when i took that stupid plan b pill or well morning after pill, it woke me up from my lil hypnosis. i noticed his behavior, him hitting me, bullying me and all that shit just made me plan behind his back how to break up with him and make sure every one of his friends knew he was a disgusting person. I started talking to people in private about his actions and started getting more info from them from times he did shit towards them cause of course this guy is evil asf. around my bday in may, i broke up with him and 2 weeks later i did jump back into another relationship which made him even more mad and he even started texting me a lot and eventually i just blocked him. 

The next guy i started dating was honestly nice on the outside but turns out he would stay friends with Nick and would just use me for sexual purposes. he then cheated on me a whole year and some months later with a "friend" of mine. She was lowkey 2 faced asf and would just continuously lie to me and say i treated my ex bad. even though he lowkey just used me and tbh he was just a rebound from Nick. Now after a few months of being broken up with that ex, I started dating another guy who has been my friend for 4 years at this point. Turns out he would do the same and say im childish and all this and just break up with me.

 (Context before I start this next segment: I started being friends with this girl back in 10th-11th grade, she was also a victim of nick who was friends with him in middle school but after that stopped. This is extremely important for what I am about to tell you.) So this girl, lets just say her name is Cherry. Cherry starts getting weird with me during this current break up especially getting close with Nick. Of course as someone who recognizes patterns, I knew what was happening. She was falling for him. "but jam she probably didn't know his doings towards you!" she did. she was one of the ones who was also reported to the office about nick bullying her and him bullying me as well during my relationship with him. So no I don't sympathize with her when she starts dating Nick. and me and my high school friends KNEW this would go badly. I eventually stopped being friends with her around June 2024. I stopped talking to her and eventually I would start redating my ex from 9th grade who is my current bf now. Now she texts me back when the 2nd week of college classes started for the fall, saying she was sorry and all that and that she hope we can be friends again. Ofc I like giving people chances cause i want to see them redeem themselves and actually show growth. So we become friends again and than she starts telling me about what he's said to her. and when I say this guy is fucking insane to even be able to pull girls still, I mean it. He proceeded to send a text to her saying that he would cut out her ovaries so him and her would not have kids. the only reason he said this is because Cherry does want a family in the future WITH THIS GUY APPARENTLY like holy shit. then one day around mayish or juneish, she texts me saying nick and her got into a fight. and i was like shit what happened.  Cherry proceeds to tell me that nick usually picks her up and he was on his way to do so. Ofc cherry was on the phone with her father and so she was a little late going down to head to his car. He starts like literally knocking on the door like if he's the police. When she proceeds to open the door WHILE ON THE PHONE WITH HER FATHER MIND YOU, he starts yelling at her, starts name calling her, which funny enough cherry's house has a RING DOOR BELL CAMERA THAT WAS RECORDING THIS TOO!!!! so her father was fucking pissed off which yes king you have every right to be mad. and so Cherry's dad tells Nicks mom about this and restricts his daughter from seeing him. and than he restricts her from seeing him ever. Btw i think it should be important to bring this up BUT she has epilepsy, her seizures are stress induced. so that means any stress can cause her to go into a full blown seizure. Now she keeps telling me and this other girl who im friends with, Fern, that her seizures are getting worst and her dad doesn't want her to date Nick anymore. Like fucking duh put two and two together. Btw i have been telling her ever since he said he would cut her ovaries out to break up with him or rethink the entire relationship. fern knew this but didn't say shit and would let Cherry continue into her delusions. So i was getting sick and tired of this, it also caused me to start remembering his abuse towards me and tbh i would break down occasionally in my room or with my bf in the early mornings. So the next she started saying that nick was disrespecting her father and getting mad at her for this whole ordeal when it was fucking him who fucked up, i just told her bluntly, break up with him. she was saying she will but never did. So I started to slowly stop being friends with her and Fern cause Im tired being the only one who knows what to say and have to constantly hear her shit about Nick. So I left a GC back in September of 2025 and blocked both her and fern on EVERYTHING. then when she left a server my bf owns she said "im leaving cause i got blocked by a certain SOMEBODY" like bitch fuck you honestly. You're blocked for a reason. Anyways, i made a story 2 months ago saying, if you're friends with Cherry or Nick, unfollow me now. (i had unblocked her cause tbh it's not like she's gonna talk to me lol) She then texted me ig cause someone told her, and she was telling ME to woman up. Like girl you are not telling me to woman up when your boyfriend is a rapist, an abuser and a fucking weirdo. and I told her off and deleted her contact fully. Now recently as of now, my bf has informed me that he thinks Nick and her broke up. which tbh i wish that's true and i  hope she recovers and actually grows up. 

Any who that's my lil gossip and all that. OH one more thing, she has a spacehey here as well and she tried saying her bf is innocent and hasn't abused her, even though he has emotionally, mentally, and verbally abused her and has disrespected her father. so im honestly pissed she would spread such misinformation when her bf is a horrible son of a bitch. AND THAN he also tried using the "i have a dissociative personality disorder" which tbh yes ik people can have disorders as such but they don't abuse and manipulate people. But yea that's all. Tell me what you think about this and if im actually in the wrong.

Jam out.