26.Dec 2021 ♡ letting myself go and truly living life, deconstructing

what do i desire, who do i admire right now.? i think generally at this moment, if anything brings you into a state of love and pleasure that's a big sign that that is strongly within you and for me that means to show what is truly important to me... truly.. it's hard when you feel like the things you previously felt you loved now don't fit into that anymore. It's so inconvenient that it doesn't feel how you think it should.

That's what I think Venus Rx is, and I think people with a natal venus rx constantly reflect on what they truly value and actually appreciate on a daily, not being able to let anything that isn't fitting to their inner state be claimed as something they value for long.

I said before that I'm frustrated, because I'm doing things that *should* bring me joy because that's what I should love based on what I've put all my energy into so far. I'm asking myself, if this can't bring me joy, then what can?

As a mc sextile venus person, I do want to benefit off of my pleasures, so if I can't benefit off of these things I put alot of time and energy into cultivating, now what? Do I just let this go??? Maybe I just need a break, or maybe I've been far too intense in my cultivation for this specific pleasure that it has become something past pleasure and instead labour. I want to be rich in potential and with everything I do, feel like every opportunity is always open for me when i feel like it. I want to tap into my heart, and let myself roam with no fear of staying in line. I will let this go. Let me let go