my pet rat GARRY

here are some fun facts about my new pet rat GARRY. HE is super intelligent, HE has a self destruct button located inside the inside of HIS right cheek, HE drinks Pepsi and eats moths for a living and HE read feminist literature. (his phone number is 1-800-662-HELP hit HIM up ladies)

give HIM belly rubs and HE might grand you around 1-3 wishes, that IS if your rice purity score is above 80, if your score is below 0, then HE will launch you into the sky at a extremely high speed tearing all of your flesh off by time you touch the clouds, leaving you just a skeleton by time you hit the ozone layer.

don't make HIM angry, HE will instantly kill you with HIS ultra mega pin ball launcher. (patented) 

he's so fucking cute, i just want to rub HIS bell- WEEEEEeeee....