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Okay, so I've known that I'm trans (FtM) since, like, earlier this year. So far, like, IRL, only my close friends know about it. They've been great to me but there's just one thing that's been bothering me these past few months.
There's this childhood friend, we've been neighbours since we were in diapers. He's such a good friend to me, he's been through my ups and downs (not much on the latter), I see him as my brother. But, he's homophobic and transphobic.
It's not surprising, since our religion and whole country is against it. And last year, I told him that I was suicidal, I hoped that he would try to understand and also because I trust him, but instead, he thought it was a joke. A friend of his that overheard approached us and they laughed at my face, saying "Oh my god, I've never seen a girl that wants to go to hell so bad!" ...like, What the actual fuck? I lost trust in my childhood friend there, but I still have hope ig.
Now, we've grown really close again since we're gonna graduate middle school (mid-school is 'til 9th grade in my country), and spent time a lot. A few days ago, we were playing in the rain, and I suddenly got the urge to want to tell him that I'm trans. I didn't because I don't want to break us apart. He's such a special friend to me but I can't let it out of my head. Because what do you mean he's gonna see me as "the girl in my friendgroup' forever??? It sucks that we're so close but I can't even reveal something that's part of me.
And if I could bring up my fav tv show in this topic? I feel like Merlin when he could never reveal to Arthur that he has magic since Arthur had always seen it as "evil" (excluding s5e13) despite that Merlin is magic. but I don't have magic, it's just the fact that I'm a guy.
Idk if anybody would respond but I just needed to let it out of my chest.
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ragabliali
awe hi there, wanted to give my perspective as an older transmasc too from indo, unfortunately that yes it is better to not tell people about your identity for now due to prejudices and old beliefs, but being someone thats close to them you also have the power to give them a new perspective as well though it is a slow process and a delicate one of you trying to coax them into having an open mind. Like me personally, while ive stayed inherently closeted saved for a few very close friends who're also queer and allies, i also managed to befriend a wide array of people that can count as following our country's norm and i do managed to see how their perspective can shift if someone had shine a light a bit into 'that' area ykwim? all in all, there's still many years ahead of you and i do hope the people of the country will be more accepting for people like us
Another Transmasc from Indo? hell yeah dude
I'm gonna keep this advice in mind, and also probably test the waters by bringing up lgbtq+ related topics but not actually coming out.
hope you have a good day, sir :D
by W!lh3Lm; ; Report
INOI.exe (neet) ♥️🇦🇷
Buddy... I'm afraid to say you are diagnosed with "bad luck."
Look, ain't sugarcoat it. Most of people? They dislike the idea of trans. They are blinded by hatred, and prejudice. The best thing you can do now? Endure it. It will hurt, I know. Trust me. But the best thing for now is to not overshare (or share at all) with people around you.
Keep it shut until is safe. Or until you can finally live on your own terms (which will take time).
I wish you the best of good luck. Just don't let their hate blind you as well. Not everyone hates trans people. I don't.
Life is hard...specially to those who feel different about themselves.
Never give up. Stay strong, kiddo. You can do this.
Thank you for the advice and not sugarcoating it, I really needed that :,)
I'm planning to do my best at keeping my mouth shut and not "accidentally" come out.
:)
by W!lh3Lm; ; Report