I dream so I don't think

been a minute since i opened this website cos depressions been kicking me in the ass (still is lol), and its as if i become blind when i go through these episodes. i completely forget everything i have to look forwad to and just sit deep within my feelings. 

for the longest time ive been plannng to travel europe after i grduate from university, especially france, italy, denmark, and spain. i always dream about it and for fun do research about plane tickets, accomodation and whatnot. it gets me excited for my future. but i havent thought about this trip for so long and it came up in my mind again today out of nowhere. dreaming gets me excited and makes me feel i have direction, something im missing when i go through these episodes.

this to me is so important, ive realised, beause ive come up with a new plan thats making me feel hopeful and excited. ive always wanted to live in a different country, and i feel like i wanna move to barcelona after school. whether or not i go through with this plan doesnt matter, if i change it or don't follow through with any of my plans i dont care because right now its making me happy, and thats all i need; the right now. i need to dream so i can get out of these slumps i always find myself in.