Sad so so sad

I feel like such a failure, other people my age are married and have kids and have like a full salary job while all i do is play sims 4 and cry every day about how much of a loser i am. I hate being so alone all the time and i always do it to myself. I could go out but whenever i am out all i do is think about how ugly n stupid i am. I really hate being this way and i wanna chnage myself to make other people wanna be my friend but thats def NOT the answer. Idk i just wanna feel normal but then everyone tells me to get therapy and sure i could but all they do is say "think positive" as if i havent spent most of my childhood and adulthood getting help. Wtf am i to do when nothing works and im just a big fat loser. God i hate how depressing i sound which is why i always hesitate to talk to people ughhhh i wish my life was easier and i had actual family who helped me w this stuff.