recap… of EVERYTHING… (11/02/25)

so. it’s been awhile.

yeah i didn’t really promise that id be active and i lowkey forgot i had this lol

um

i guess ill start on some things that i can remember on the top of my head

i think my friend has a crush on me or something i don’t know, or like a really strong affection towards me.

i’ve known her awhile, maybe around 10 months (wow?!?) and she’s my entire world. we met on a sally face roleplay server lmao

but i can’t help but feel some sort of…. mixed feelings

i love her as a friend, she’s such a good friend. but i don’t want to get in a relationship just yet. i’m not open to online dating and i honestly don’t handle relationships that well.

in two relationships i’ve been in, it’s just “i don’t like this thing that you are doing” and i’ll quickly lose interest or something. i’m an immature 16 year old as well, no i’m not going to handle dating as well as married couples.

and also, in our friendship, saying “i love you!” is so normal because i DO love her platonically. she’s my bestest friend ever. she even gives me silly nicknames like “my beloved twink wife/husband”

um aside from my mixed feelings about my friend (and btw ofc i still view her in a positive light, im just not sure if she’s just trying to hide a crush or not)

everything has been going well, surprisingly

october was calm, it was great. halloween was so much fun too! i got dress up as childhood sua from alien stage and my friend matched with me!

i’m also starting to play more bass, which is nice but i also wanna balance some guitar.. and i haven’t had the chance at all.

overall life has been pretty quiet, calm and peaceful.

i hope november is more peaceful!!

— FERN OUT !!