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yes it is true. i am able to feel again. i have been experimenting with this time since i had gotten my sensations back. but it is strange. i do not make a face when i am hurt. i still do not behave like the other cregs once i feel the pain that i cause to my own body over and over. i do find it interesting. i have been cutting my fingers and rubbing the substances they leak together to watch them split apart as the pain goes in and back out of my fingers. it is strange how the body reacts. how my body pulls away a bit when i do hurt myself. how my muscles tense up. it is all amusing in a way. i have been missing out i need to experiment more.
i can feel.
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LetMeUnderYourSkin_BR
Feeling numb is terrible. It's like any other pain, but without the pain.
Your mind must be better encoding threat signals, to fight them instead of just letting them happen. Pain only occurs if the brain senses it.
Good news for once, right? Little good news, micro, but good. Web need to feel something like any other animal
i always thought it was the lack of feeling pain that caused this feeling of numbness. but i seem to be wrong. i am not really sure what to do then to continue causing more pain in hopes i will make a face some day.
by Timewithoutmeaning; ; Report
Knowing that numbness is a type of pain, just like all suffering, changed my perspective on it and helped me fight. I didn't fight because I believed I deserved happiness, but because I was tired of being permanently like this.
Instead of thinking, "What the hell is wrong with me to be so dead/dry inside? Why am I like this?" I started thinking, "Oh, so I'm like this because it's...hurting?...Not feeling pain, not feeling anything is painful, and I am tired of it."
I'm not going to recommend that you make your blood flow again through small cuts, because in the long run the body produces its anesthetic neurotransmitters and you'll go back to numbness (and get frustrate).
It worked in the short term, to see that there's hope, but in the long term it's a failed business. On my dark days, I used to purposefully starve myself to try to feel the pain of hunger and feel something, and guess what? I got used to the hunger in less than a week.
To feel something, pain doesn't need to be the focus. Waking up the body has to be the focus.
Waking up the body means making your heart beat faster. Feeling cold. Sweating. Getting goosebumps. And then feeling pleasure. Returning to feeling pleasure is the ultimate remedy, seriously.
I would jump around my room in warm clothes until my heart raced and I was sweating. This made me feel thirsty and gave me pleasure when drinking water while feeling my heart beat.
Cold showers also helped to wake up the body. There were times when I wouldn't go to the shower for fear of feeling cold, and I realized that feeling this little bit of cowardice was comforting. It was my body running away from the "threat," which is normal, and what good news it is to have something normal.
I also chewed ice to have a different sensation in my mouth, and I put ice on some parts of my body. Behind the neck is very relaxing.
I also remember writing, writing a lot. Writing can progressively bring back your feelings. Even if you only write one sentence, it's revealing.
When I realized I was getting better, it was when I got emotional listening to music again. I didn't know I needed to cry until that day.
None of these things are guarantees of success; they were just strange things I did because I had no help from anyone and no money to find a professional. But wake your body. I promisse that you can do it. Keep your hopes up and take it slow. Your body will not betray you in long term.
We don't know each other, but I sympathize with you. Is it okay if I check in with you from time to time? It could be to celebrate small pieces of good news or to vent about feeling lost. It's not a requirement, so feel free.
You'll make face one day. Believe in this silly thing.
by LetMeUnderYourSkin_BR; ; Report
i see. . i will look into your words wisely thank you. and you may check on me if you would like. i find it interesting that you have come to this conclusion on your very own.
by Timewithoutmeaning; ; Report
<3
by LetMeUnderYourSkin_BR; ; Report