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Back to art class today.
I keep saying "class" or "school" even though it's technically neither. I'm in practicum, which just means I'm paying for access to facilities/faculty without any actual curriculum. So I don't have any deadlines or grades to worry about.
Still, old habits die hard. I used to put a lot of pressure on myself when I was here 5 years ago getting my associate's. It's hard to not default back to that mentality.
For example, last week was a short "fall break" (we didn't have that back when I first went here lol). The week before that, I was sick and had to miss class. So it's been two weeks--and I haven't worked on my project at all.
I've been busy working and dealing with personal life stuff and trying to make more time for myself to relax. But I still feel like I've "failed" somehow with my art, even though I was doing other stuff that was important.
I'm also still kinda scared of my professor lowkey lol. Not in a bad way--she's one of the nicest people I've ever met, and we're super close. But she can be really intense lol. She remarked that I should make 20 of the drawing/collages I'm doing. And then she said that I should have a show at the end of the semester!
20 pieces??? A show??? She also wants to put my work out and see if I can sell it in any local galleries. Ahh!!!
It's just a lot to digest after going practically cold turkey with art for 5 years lol.
It's a tough balance to strike--actively making art, but not letting it take up space for other things you've allotted in your personal time, or being inflexible when other things pop up.
As with everything, I'm an addict. My whole life it's felt as if I either need to do NOTHING BUT MAKE ART or DO ANYTHING BUT. Day to day, this manifests as a lot of creative oscillations--artist's mood swings, if you will. Lol.
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Tell Me Secrets
Oh man, this post really tickles my social worker senses. Let me ask you a few questions. There's no need to answer in this thread- in fact if it's too personal, delete this comment.
How does it feel to have someone who believes in your art like this?
What about having your art displayed in a gallery scares you?
When you think about your past relationship with art, do you feel you are in a different place now? How so?
What do you think causes you to be so hot and cold with art?
Like I said, no need to answer these unless you really want to.
Hey! I appreciate your comment. These are all really good questions.
I've been working on a blog post for my website that goes into some of this. I'll reply again when I get home from work with some excerpts! :)
by Xavier; ; Report
Shadow Bliss
Good luck. I look forward to seeing what you produce
Thank you!! Im at work rn, I'll make another post when I get home showing what I did today :)
by Xavier; ; Report