your new life will cost you your old one

I often lose sight of my dreams and because of that I think I have no dreams at all.

I call it the fog. I know my circumstances are hindering movement towards my ambitions and a new life but I don't know how to move forward without complete destruction of this one. I know I'm depressed and my family knows it too even if they can't understand it. I know what it would take to get me out of this mess. I also know that I am not ready to take that leap of faith. Because how does somebody take a leap of faith when they've no faith at all? It would hurt a lot of people for me to be brave. Maybe that's why I want them to do it with me. But you can't force somebody to abandon a system they have spent their entire life clinging to. I guess wanting it anyway makes me a selfish person. Jealous too.