the love triangle at my school I really don't want to be apart of + deep talk why I dislike teen love and (immature) boys. ദ്ദി(｡•̀ ,<)~✩‧₊ ||| rant

             heyyy guys!! here's a update/part two! very crazy stuff about H in here dawg:                       

                                    https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1964184

                                    °˖✧◝yoo hoo!!! tw disclaimer incoming!◜✧˖°

                 this blog entry includes some mature topics! such things include the following: 

                                                          ♡ seggs

                                                 ♡ toxic relationships

                                                     ♡ swear words 

                                                    ♡ perverted men

                                                           ♡ ext!

                                            thank you for reading! enjoy :P

I hate teenage love. especially love triangles.

before you call me a grumpy sour grape who's jealous of couples, let me clarify; I am a HIGHSCHOOLER.

HIGH.SCHOOL.

I came to school to STUDY. I go to a private school that's worth a fortune, and I don't want a single one of my parent's pennies to go to waste. i'd rather have them see their daughter get a scholarship to a prestigious university than making out with some dude who'll probably end up a child predator in his 30's.

what's even the point of teen love? its not even like those cute 2000's/ 2010's shojuo mangas. its just some bigoted popular girl with mango flavoured lungs getting together with some weird, chopped ass red flag '67', mason popular boy with a ice cream haircut , making out 183912038921 times a day in public, and then breaking up a week later. 99% chance the girl will STILL be obsessed with the boy afterward.

do you see the reality now? yeah. there it is. let that sink in because that's every single high school couple in a nutshell.

I don't want a relationship like that. I want a proper guy who'll treat me right and is dating me so we can get married and live happily ever after. honestly, if you ask me? those kinds of partners are pretty rare. and before you see that I'm a heterosexual (straight) she/her female, and automatically assume i'm saying this about men, i'm not. i'm saying this about EVERYONE. 

women, men, genderless, transgenders, gender fluids, neopronouns, EVERYONE. 

I honestly have no hope. Im just waiting until I graduate university or college and praying that I find someone that's like my f/o in my yumeship who's kind, polite, attractive, and literally just a green flag so I can marry him.

growing up looking attractive to people's standards has always been a struggle.

well, honestly, not always. I grew up really, really chopped as a kid. I had these really thick, untamed eyebrows, paired with a unibrow that was visible no matter what I did, yellow teeth, bad breath, frizzy hair, dry lips, a moustache, and bad hygene. 

but then? I changed.

I started taking care of myself, I waxed any body or face hair that made me feel off, I started brushing my teeth routinely and young a tongue scraper (yes, I didn't do that. I was that gross.), my hair became shiny and silky smooth, I got slender hands, I groomed my eyebrows, started taking care of my lips, and a bunch of other things. even after I fell out of love with some dumb guy after December 2024, I got bangs, with completely changed my face shape. I also started doing a LOT of wonyonguisim stuff. not to get him back, but unintentionally.

fast forward to now; I have clear skin, doe eyes with long eyelashes, soft lips, healthy coloured teeth, good breath, shiny silky hair ( like I said earlier), a skinnier torso, and loads of other things, along with smelling really nice. my signature sends are strawberry and vanilla! yum!. my glow up was unrecognizable. I may wear pien makeup, but honestly? I dont even wear it when im at school or not dressed in jirai kei. I dont NEED IT. I just wear it because I like it and it's a staple of jirai kei. besides, if I DID wear it every day, I'd probably break out!

I changed. 

sometimes I see pictures of my old self in my moms phone in her camera roll. it feels really, really weird. in went from a cute little girl, to a ugly preteen, to a fawn-like teenager. words can't decribe how strange it is to look back at those kinds of things.

being pretty is nice. really nice. I get pretty privilege, and complimets about my features.

"wow! that shade of lip tint suits you so well!"

"your hair is so soft! can I play with it? :3"

" I loooove your outfit !"

"your hair is so cute!"

"someone here smells really good... it smells like strawberry shortcake!"

"your eyelashes are so long!"

mashaallah. ♡♡♡

but, there is a part of it that sends a knot to my stomach.

men.

men, men.

men, men, MEN.

MEN.

old men, young men ,tall men, small men,  all men.

Actually, i'm talking about boys. scrap 'men'. BOYS. 

I don't care how old you are. even if you harass women, you are not a man. you are just a boy in the end. a filthy, disgusting, grimy, sticky, immature, boy.

I don't like it when boys look at me. I don't like it when anyone who's not either my f/o or my father interacts with me. 

I dont like how they always look at attractive women. I really don't.

sometimes I just wish I could just curl up into a ball and canon bolt myself into Antartica. that way I wouldn't have to see any men. 

what do I think of boys? I think they're delusional.

they're always constantly peer pressured. they don't want to be called sissies so they hide their feelings like poker cards and act block headed all the time.

the only poker card they don't want to hide for some reason is how perverted they are;.

all they think about is " SEGGS!!!!!!!!!! SEGGS SEGGS SEGGS!!!!!!!! BOOBIES BOOBIES AND MORE BOOBIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  and it disgusts me to. the. core. 

no one wants to see that. cover up your entire card deck you disgusting excuse for a human being. f٧ck you. fuck you all. all of you except for the men who don't have a perverted poker card whom I doubt even exist. I know me spilling my thoughts on you gender might be painful, but thank you. thank you for not harassing women. you don't know how much of a difference it makes.

i'm not a virgin in a 'clean and pure tradwife' way. i'm a virgin in a 'f٧ck off' way. I want to meet my soulmate, but at the same time, I want nothing to do with men. weird, huh? 

and that's why I dont like being involved in this dumbazz love triangle.  i'll introduce you to it now. sorry for the wait! just had to put that out there.

remember that love triangle that's mentioned in the title? well here it is! Again, sorry for ranting so much, you must feel click baited lol.

its actually more of a love square. i'm glad Oscar has (slightly) started talking to me less, but H is still annoying as FUH. 💔💔💔

what do you mean that when everyone else in arabic class is presenting, your literally sleeping in between presentations, but when I present, you IMMEDIATELY fix your posture 💔

what do you mean that you feel the urge to LISTEN IN on every conversation I have and even INTERRUPT. I do NOT care.

what do you mean one second your blushing and trying to start a conversation with me and looking down to the ground, and the next calling me a child predator because i'm a babysitter 凸(￣ヘ￣)

(hmmm.... tsundere antics.... except hes not a cute moe anime girl so instead of being kawaii it just makes him a dih)

I HATE H. HES ALSO CHOPPED.

I do NOT care.

I am NOT your future wife bozo (눈_눈)

to sum it up, here's the love triangle...its honestly more of a love square lol. :

if you want to know why I hate O, tap here:

https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1917308

tap on the image if you want to take a closer look!

I hate this love triangle. most people get exited when they pull guys, but good riddance! I think it's the salt of the earth! (Scott Pilgrim ref?!?!?!?)

ive pulled about 4 boys in my life. its not much, but i'm glad its no higher than that! all they boys in my school are all clones of each other. theyr'e all bitch-ass anti-feminist brown/white boys who think they're the next volleyball or football champion!

i'm going to put a update on O, he's still trying to pull me. now that he noticed that I apparently dont like smart guys (PS: I DO!!!!!!!! he just acted like a stuck up self centred twink instead of smart!) he's now being a "nice guy".

little does he know, I still hate him. no matter how a person changes themselves, people witll always see them as how they were in their worse possible state. I know that because that's how people see me. that why I only do things for myself, because, others do not give a sh1t.

I can't believe there's someone out there willing to re-write themselves just to get me to fall in love with them. that's so stupid. 

Ive made a few builtins about H. if you've read them you know how infuriating he is. sadly, they were posted a long time ago, so they are now deleted.

now that i've introduced the topic, i'm just going to yap about something that happened during October bake sale between AL and H. 

oh! before I do that, I have to introduce AL !!!

AL is a girl OBSESSED with H. like, Yandere obsessed. she's a sirlanki ( I think?) girl who's also suffering from adhd. she's failing most of her classes.

for some reason, she thinks were friends?she thinks of most people that seee her as just an accuantiance as her "besties". I really hope Eva doesn't convince her to get spacehey, or else I'll have to delete this little part of the blog. 

I don't want to be her friend because, like they say, your friends sculpt you. I know that because I went from being friends with the backstabbing, chopped, weird kids, to the nice, muslim smart girls and kind alt kids, and that changed me for the better so, so much.

like I said, she's kind, but also failing her classes, and has a abusive mother, so I really don't want that to rub off on me. im working really hard in my academics while she's getting 40%. 

bismillah, I don't become like her.

ANYWAY. 

so if you didn't read the notes in the love triangle, scroll back up and read that, because what im about to say has to do with that.

so, all the secondary kids at my school, (ages 12 to 17) all have lunch in the same exact block, and  the bake sale is usually hosted in the KG gym, so its PACKED. im not exaggerating when I say that it looked and felt and was like this:

not to mention that I was pressed against a table while trying to buy food. and there was some girl talking to the girl in front of me and trying to take my place in the line, so I had to keep shoving her.

she even ignored me when I said excuse me! that's what rude people deserve, shoving! >:(

sooo yeah. I got a multi color jello cup, two chocolate chip cookies, a donut, a pack cheese curlz, and some other crap, which was pretty friki'n cool! its was yummy!

buuuuuut, I came at a later time, so I didn't really witness what im about to tell you. AL told me about it. god, I hate this love triangle! why can't my f/o be real so I can be excluded from all this! wait, no... that would just make the love square morph into a love pentagon hybrid, except with two people actually liking each other and actually having a healthy relationship. he's a voice in my head, and he keeps insisting he's real. help me.

anywho, let me tell you what I was about to say. god, I get off topic so, so often! 

so, AL and H were in the bake sale room, and it was SO PACKED TOGETHER  that they were completely PRESSED TOGETHER.

AAA!

and THEN, they almost kissed by ACCIDENT because they were so pressed together!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and so, AL fell backwards to avoid that, and H CAUGHT HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD??????????????????????????????????????????????

and then AL just started blushing and H started looking REALLY irritated, and then he left before anything else could happen.

keep in mind as I was writing this, this series of events happened YESTERDAY.

         anywho, you have scrolled all the way down! thnx for reading my rant ml ♡♡♡ 

                     here's a little souvenir from this blog!! a ddlc scene generator! : https://edave64.github.io/Doki-Doki-Dialog-Generator/release/

            bye peeps !♡♡♡ take care of urselves and have a great day !!! ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ 

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