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I keep thinking about a conversation I had with my Rabbi earlier today, about what it means to be openly and visibly Jewish in this world. The question sounds simple at first, but unravels the longer I sit with it. What does it mean to walk through life as a visible marker of a people, a faith, a history so often defined by both endurance and erasure? What does it mean to keep showing up in a world that seems to be tiring of us again?
For me, being Jewish has never been something I could tuck away, even if I wanted to. I have always been openly, unmistakably Jewish – not out of defiance or bravery, but because there has never been any other way to be. My life, my experiences, my politics, my moral compass – all arise from a Jewish framework. Judaism is the rhythm of my days, the language of my gratitude, the way I understand both joy and grief. I have no interest in pretending otherwise.
But that doesn’t make it easy. It’s becoming harder, lately, to carry Jewishness so visibly. Antisemitism doesn’t feel like some abstract force, learnt about in history books; it’s everywhere. It’s overwhelming. It lives in the half jokes people make about money, in the classmates posting conspiracy theories without knowing or caring that it makes me feel sick to my stomach. It’s in the graffiti on local shuls, the Magen Davids torn off necks, the online spaces where people don’t even pretend to hide their contempt anymore. I don’t know how much longer I can watch this unfold while the world insists it’s not happening.
And I don’t know what to do with that pain. There is this deep ache in me, this sense that no matter where I stand, I don’t quite belong. I can sing the praises of my Jewish heritage forever – I can celebrate the beauty of our traditions, the resilience of our people, the poetry and argument and song that define us – but that love doesn’t erase the dissonance. I feel too frum to be liberal, too queer to be orthodox. Too visible to ever pass as goyische, too patrilineal to be consistently accepted as Jewish. No matter where I turn, there’s always someone ready to tell me I don’t fit.
Sometimes I wonder if this not-fitting is just part of being Jewish. Maybe it always has been. We are a people who wrestle – with God, with identity, with the world. We are built on contradictions and questions. Maybe the point is not to resolve them, but to live within them honestly. Still, it hurts to feel like I am forever too much or not enough of something.
I don’t have an answer. I don’t think my Rabbi did either. But I do enjoy the quiet defiance of continuing to show up as myself anyway, even if it feels unsafe – to keep lighting candles, to keep saying the Sh’ma, to keep speaking about being Jewish even when it’s uncomfortable. Maybe that’s what being openly Jewish means now; to live without shrinking, even when the world is asking you to disappear.
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Zach
Thank you for posting this I feel very similar. It’s very hard to fit in anywhere because so many ppl who are otherwise cool post conspiracy theories about us out of the blue and I don’t understand why.
Nuancer
“No society can include us without simultaneously alienating us from it. My belonging in a society always breaks down, which enables me to turn against this society when it takes a direction that I cannot accept. This is why I am free. Freedom is not a value of belonging, of being a member of a free society. Freedom becomes apparent as a value when we experience our nonbelonging, a nonbelonging that is universal because it applies to everyone, even those who most feel like they fit in.”
― Todd McGowan, Universality and Identity Politics
Nuancer
Not as Jewish, but as a Christian with agnostic tendencies I find this part powerful and really relatable, thank you
"but that love doesn’t erase the dissonance. I feel too frum to be liberal, too queer to be orthodox. Too visible to ever pass as goyische, too patrilineal to be consistently accepted as Jewish. No matter where I turn, there’s always someone ready to tell me I don’t fit.
Sometimes I wonder if this not-fitting is just part of being Jewish. Maybe it always has been. We are a people who wrestle – with God, with identity, with the world. We are built on contradictions and questions. Maybe the point is not to resolve them, but to live within them honestly."
Dashie
Just don't be a communist and you're fine. Also, I don't know if the world is particularly against Jews. We still teach atrocity propaganda in America and our political system is infested with AIPAC dollars
"i don't think the world is particularly against jews" followed by shoah denial is kinda crazy. do you not see the irony here?
anyway, i'm uk based. in october, on the holiest day of the jewish year, two jews were killed and three injured in a terrorist attack on a synagogue, and that's just what's closest to me. what do you have to say about the 2002 Lyon synagogue attack, the 2002 Djerba synagogue bombing, the 2009 Caracas synagogue attack, the 2014 Jerusalem synagogue attack, the 2017 Gothenberg synagogue attack, the 2018 Pittsburgh synagogue shooting, the 2019 Poway synagogye shooting, the 2019 Money Hanukkah Stabbing, and the 2019 Halle synagogue shooting?
Bringing it to more recent events, what about the 2022 Colleyville synagogue hostage crisis, the 2023 Djerba synagogue shooting, and the 2024 Melbourne synagogue attack? The recent firebombing (june 2025) in colorado killed one and injured another 15. Do you think that suggests that people "aren't particularly against jews"?
even when jews aren't being killed, we're being discriminated against. in america (the framework i'm using because i assume that's where you're based), antisemitic incidents rose 200% from october 2023 to september 2024. according to the FBI in 2023, antisemitic incidents accounted for 68% of religion-based hate crime, and that's likely underreported.
jew hatred is described as the oldest form of hate, and it's unfortunately still pervasive. i'm a relatively secular jew, not someone who "presents" visibly jewish (though i am very open about it), and i couldn't begin to tell you the amount of antisemitism i face on a regular basis. "just don't be a communist" is dumb asf. we're not discriminated against for our political beliefs, jews are discriminated aginst for our religion and ethnicity.
by enfys; ; Report
To be honest I have not read that much on holocaust revisionism so I wont get into it. But there has been much written about it in the "holocaust handbooks" series of books. I just dont know what to think about it. I think there is a reason people dont like jews and jewish culture and its because many jewish people act conspiratorial toward "goyim"
by Dashie; ; Report
I'm just going to paste this comment, because I think it says something really important and phrases it in a great way. If you'd like more information about the history of Jew-hatred I'm happy to share it.
"The reason for anti-Jewish hatred and persecution has absolutely nothing to do with things Jewish men and women did, said or thought. Religious and racial persecution is not the fault of the victim but of the persecutor and antisemitism, like all prejudices, is inherently irrational. Framing history in a manner that places the reason for racial hatred with its victims is a technique frequently employed by racists to justify their hateful ideology.
The reasons why Jews specifically were persecuted, expelled, and discriminated against throughout mainly European history can vary greatly depending on time and place, but there are overarching historical factors that can help us understand the historical persecution of Jews - mainly that they often were the only minority available to scapegoat."
by enfys; ; Report
whether certain claims are factually true—like the influence of "AIPAC dollars" or the "revisionism" found in certain handbooks—philosopher Slavoj Žižek argues that focusing on facts actually misses the core problem of antisemitism.
According to Zizek, the real issue isn't whether a specific statement about Jewish people is true or false; it's about why a person needs that story. Žižek explains that even if we could find a statistic to support a claim (like Jews having influence in banking or media), we have already "sold [our] soul to the devil" by accepting the terms of the debate. This is because:
* Antisemitism is a "story" used to explain away social problems. In the 1920s, many people felt their lives were a "confused mess" due to economic crisis and social change. Instead of looking at the complicated reality, they used the "Jewish plot" as a simple explanation: They said "we are in this mess because of the Jews".
* Societies like to think they are perfectly harmonious, so they start to seek blame for the problems that naturally happen in any community.
* The obsession with Jews is "pathological." Žižek uses the example of a pathologically jealous husband: even if his wife *is* actually cheating on him, his jealousy is still a problem because of the role it plays in his own identity. In the same way, someone’s obsession with Jewish influence is wrong, by its very nature because it’s structured to cover up a deeper lie about how society works.
This same logic applies to the comment, "just don't be a communist and you're fine". Žižek notes that modern obsessions with things like "Cultural Marxism" function exactly like the "Jewish plot". By telling someone to just avoid being a "communist," it's probably just trying to blame an "external cause" for things that are disliked.
Instead of facing the tensions of our society, it’s easier to project those problems onto a specific group or political label. As Zizek points out, even if a fact used in a hateful argument were true, it would still be a lie because it’s being used to create a —a total ideological worldview—that is built on fundamental errors about why society is struggling.
To put it simply, think of a student who is failing a class and insists it’s only because the teacher is "out to get them." Even if that teacher is actually grumpy or unfair, the student’s obsession with the teacher’s "plot" is a distraction. It’s a story they tell themselves, so they don't have to face the fact that the subject is just really hard or that they haven't been studying. The teacher's "plot" is their shield against reality.
by Nuancer; ; Report
thank you for this - Žižek is such a great philosopher and his approach to antisemitism is ever more relevant today. you've explained all this in a really helpful way!
by enfys; ; Report
xX_Dyrk_Nyte_Xx
The world has been cruel hostile and unforgiving to those of us who don't fit in. Be proud of yourself and the fact you haven't let hate and violence snuff out your authentic self.
Just know not everyone is against you and during times like these the best we can do is be compassionate and stand up for our fellow man <3
thank you <33
by enfys; ; Report