Do the things you love.

Do the things you love. 

(more like do the things you want to do because it excites you.)

this topic slightly includes thoughts on perfectionism, procrastination and self-esteem but there are high chances for me to developp on it later on :)

“Do the things you love”

It seems a bit off to say it as it seems obvious, but I feel like it's almost necessary to set a reminder cause personally, and I think I'm not the only one, I used to skip doing the things I loved just because I didn't feel like it was the “right time” to do them, or let myself drown under the excuse of fatigue. (which is real fatigue, but I had to reflect on if doing the things wouldn't actually make it feel better)

The problem is you quickly realize that days don't wait for you to make something of them and I kept getting more and more tired as it went by. As a result, I always had this feeling that I'll never have time and I'd end up doomed. These thoughts still occur to this day and I can confirm it's the best way to feel stuck and kind of never move even if you really want to (kind of mentally paralyzing). So, I felt like I'd never be able to start something at this point. And as a logical process, my mental state also followed and started to decline as I wasn't doing a thing I said I’d do. I was doing things but not something that really mattered to me. And this is probably a really efficient way to betray yourself, which I guess leads to struggles concerning the self-esteem. Most my thoughts, if not all of them, got blurry. And as I was seeing my wishes fly away from me, I started to lose the memories of what my heart used to cherish and why it exactly did. This is something most of us can get caught up into, for different reasons but it most commonly could be because our current way of living encourages numbness, this could as well be about our medias consumption and any type of stress-indulging habits that is not always in our control.

Maybe you can relate to this too, and I have to joyfully announce it's exactly where you think you can never get back up and also exactly where you definitely can.

Good news: things aren't lost even

 when they feel like it.

Gathering the courage to somehow make something, even though you are unsure, stressed and exhausted just cause we have to do something of the time we're given is one way to start. But there is tones of others, and I deeply wish you to find your personal ones, eventually some that will make it feel like an exciting part of the process you want for yourself and for your own life.
I highly recommend not pushing yourself towards unbelievable pressure for a gentle start. I say it mostly to myself honestly, that is a reminder, a lesson I have to learn, that I write down here just for the hope of it all. If you consider yourself a perfectionist and also go through all this mental fog, just know you're never alone in this.
I haven't beaten procrastination yet, as a proof : I'm starting to blog after around 1 year and a half of saying I'd do it. It was always just a matter of posting what I write anyway. But our brain has the tendencies to make it look way more serious than it actually is and over-complicate things.

What happens when you stop thinking too much about what you want to do or have to do and instead you just do it for the sake of “liking it”, is that you'll eventually realize in the process of doing it that you enjoy it more than all the fears you created for yourself. (hopefully) And it's at this exact time that the same question always comes to me : “why didn't I start earlier?”, simply because it's always scarier in our head, always worse in our mind. (always in mine at least). There is always an excuse if you want to find one.

I know this is hard to get rid of this habit if you've taken it quite a long time ago, and I know from experience believe me. But it meant to me to write this all down and encourage you, as much as myself, to start something and just do something you love once in a while. Cause what do we exactly have to loose? In a world that focuses on everything else but that, I find it important to take time for what's not seen as particularly “productive” but that still sparks something in you.

Even when you don't feel like it, reflect on why you don't, that would be another way to start somewhere. But honestly, there is no “right way”, just let it come to you or don't, it's how you feel it.

Allow your heart to get lost in curiosity. What I think matters is doing small things to make you feel at home with yourself. Sometimes it's okay to give up on something you were so attached to, to change your mind multiple times, to let go, to go back and forth, to start brand new or to over think before the first step. Because all of this is part of the process that, by the way, doesn't need to be perfect. It's important to find what your heart knows and if it feels like deep confusion, let it time. And occupy this time with love, until your truth comes to you. (if it seem to never come, you're always entirely free to create it. But I tend to think your truth is mostly found in childhood, old things you wrote, old interests that you gave up on for example)

I recognize how hard it is to do so, in a busy world like ours, but here was the reminder of the day,
do the things you love cause it gives you the chance to enjoy the life you have.

Jade :)