Living On The Streets Again (9/22-9/26)

I will state this again at the top: I am not writing this in search of advice or support. I am primarily sharing my life and my experiences as a means of expression, and secondarily hoping that a reader somewhere will have some sort of take-away from my blog.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I’m now living on the streets…again.

My time at the homeless shelter was incredibly brief. It had quite a few ups and downs, brought me much fun and friendship, laughs and tears, and it breaks my heart that I cannot stay there at this time. I don’t believe going into the reason why I cannot stay there right now would be productive in this blog, and would only detract from my reason for writing this, but there's an agreement that I can try to make a return to the shelter in 1 month; so for now I just have to keep my head up until October 22nd (minimum).

As of this past Monday (9/22) I have been sleeping outside again. The days have been about 80°F (27°C) and the nights have been in the 50°F range (10°C). The first couple nights I had to resort to wearing quite a few layers to try and stay as warm as possible, and even still I would frequently wake up throughout the night, shivering and shaking to regulate my temperature enough to fall back asleep.

I believe it was on Wednesday (9/24), my mom sent me some money to buy a sleeping bag, and I even had enough money leftover to buy some wool socks and bug spray. The sleeping bag I bought is rated for temperatures as low as 32°F (0°C), and to say that it has been a game-changer would be an understatement. With this sleeping bag, I was able to put away some of the layers that I’ve been carrying around with me, so now the weight of my possessions is lessened and easier to carry. I went from wearing several layers of hoodies, sweatpants/leggings, and a coat - to now being able to sleep comfortably through the night in just a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt.

The community center I visit every weekday provided me some supplies from their homelessness department; so now I also have a first aid kit, hand warmers, and a few emergency thermal blankets (amongst other smaller things that I don’t feel like listing, but just know that the supplies they gave me have been very helpful).

As far as where I’ve been sleeping, I’ve been living underneath a group of pine trees. So far it seems to me that these are my current best option. Pine trees provide quite a bit of shade and cover due to how thick and layered the needles of the trees are. The way these trees grow, the needles only stem out towards the ends of the branches, so if you are able to get underneath/through the pokey outside of the tree, the inside near the base tends to provide far more openness. Underneath pine trees, there’s also not a ton of life, besides the occasional pill bugs and spiders. The shade of the trees make it incredibly difficult for plants and grass to grow, and (to my understanding) the fallen needles + tree roots also soak up a lot of the moisture; so generally the inside of a pine tree is more likely to be dry and consists mostly of dirt and decaying tree material. It’s not the most comfortable experience to get stabbed by these needles when entering/leaving the tree, or when clearing out a space inside to lie down, but this is also what makes me enjoy these trees as cover. From an outsider’s perspective, why would someone expect a person to endure this and sleep in these conditions?

In the mornings, I wake up at sunrise and clear out my belongings, making sure to leave no trace. “In after dusk, out before dawn” as I’ve heard some stealth campers say. During the week I take the bus to my community center where they provide me free breakfast and lunch, and I attend several classes, such as: trauma recovery, substance use recovery, anxiety management, coping with art, and quite a few others. When I first arrive , I take some time in the bathroom to brush my teeth and occasionally take a “bird bath” in the sink to wash off the previous days' sweat, dirt, and bug spray. After these classes, I bus back to my area where I spend some time at the library winding down and charging my devices. I might also make a stop at my storage unit to reorganize what I’m carrying.

After the library closes and the night settles in, I walk to the grocery store up the road to grab some food for dinner. Sometimes I like to eat outside the store, sometimes I like to sit in some grass nearby and have what I call my “mini-picnics”. After resting and eating, I walk to the tree that I’ll be sleeping in (I frequently change locations). I set up my bed for the night, change into my wool socks, put on my padded shorts (primarily used in sports to reduce injury, but have been nice for added cushion when laying on the ground; plus they also retain quite a bit of body heat), watch a bit of YouTube, take my medications, have a little more snack-time, then try to get as much rest as I can for the next day.

There’s many things that I want to share regarding my homelessness experience. I don’t enjoy that this has been my main source of blogging, but it’s hard to talk about other areas of my life when this is taking up so much of my time and energy. I’m glad that I at least have this as an outlet for expression, a way to put myself out to the world and have a sort of diary/log of my experiences; especially when I have little time or energy to work on other art forms. Until next time.

Ad astra, per aspera.