The uk sucks btw

Still alive, just suffering the painful uk govenrment attemps to stop me jorkin my its.

done alot since i was last here, been to germany to see all my friends again (4th time this year) I love my boyfriend more than ever, Im starting uni soon, cannot wait. and I got the drawing tablet of my dreams for my upcoming 21st bday, YIPPE!

i had a really bad episond last night after finding out my mum is trying to ruin shit again. I think thats why I wanted to write today, Ive had a rough time my whole life but I learnt very young that Im not going to get the help I need so I just decided whats the point, be happy. and then all at once the last 21 years of pain and frustration will surface in a 10 minute meltdown every 6 months. Yesterday was one of those days. and i hate it, its sooo embarasing to wake up and talk to my grandma who I really frightened last night, she doesnt help, she makes it worse alot of the time but I dont blame her. her 2nd husband CTB so the whole topic is really hard for her i guess. she cried to me this morning saying I scared her but i cant help but think, does she not understand how i felt in that moment. she doesnt, no one does, and the embarasment of relapsing on SH at the age of 21. 

Grow the fuck up millie