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lately, I've been thinking a lot about college, but it's less about picking majors and researching schools and stuff
it's mostly about the college experience, of being at a college
now that I really deelly think about it it's horrifying to me, because I feel like once I cross into college I'll be genuinely alone
recently my mom changed workplace, which changed her hours to the point where they completely misalign with my own. when I get home from school, there's nobody there. dad's not living with us and so is my sister, and at least at her old hours I'd be able to chat with her for a few minutes before she had to leave. and even if she left before I got home, her workplace is on the way to my walk from school so I can just pop in and say hi anyway
but now, unless she has a rare off day there's nobody home until I'm already ready to sleep, and it made me realize just how miserable being alone feels
the house feels quiet with only me inside, and that's with me having my mom in the night
how the hell am I gonna manage with just myself if it already feels so miserable like this
additionally I've never really been trained on any house skills except very recently, so it'll be overwhelming to live on my own now too
when it comes to friendship, I really don't feel like the friendships I've built will last into college. and even then they'll be fully online now, every last friend. I know college is a place to be social and make friends as well as learn, but I don't think I'll make any friends
it was already a stroke of luck I'm even with the friends I have now and I genuinely don't think it'll happen again
and forget romance entirely, that hasn't happened yet and I bet it's not happening in a million years
as for roommates im weary, I really don't know if I'll be lucky enough to get cool and friendly roommates, let alone ones that are decent to live with
everything about college just seems horrifying to me now that I really reflect on it, and I don't know if I'm ready for it at all.
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goodbunny
can't really relate to this so dont know what to say but im sure it'll all work out. if its good then woohoo and if its bad well you won't die. something will happen but you're not gonna die just from having a really sucky college experience. ik that's not helpful but like you'll be ok in either scenario. worst case you are very very depressed and not eating well and your roommates suck and you have no friends but honestly thats just life right
i guess that's fair, ill survive and I know that, it's just that an outcome like that is just miserable to think about
by Ani; ; Report
yeah but I mean most people have a college experience like that from what I've heard and they turn out ok. wtv sorry this isn't helpful I hope it turns out good for u twin
by goodbunny; ; Report