Report Blog Entry
I deserve this.
Leave me in this lurch.
Vending machine swallows my coins
Spits back nothing
I guess it learned from you.
A humming parking lot
Bad guitar cable.
You text when the sky feels too heavy
Then vanish before it clears.
I'm a bookmark in someone else's novel
Creased and bent
There for when you remember the page.
You show up with storm water on your shoes
Say nothing, sit down
Leave crumbs.
You scatter sweetness like loose change
And I pick it up
Count it like proof that I exist.
I'd rather bruise in your hands
Than disappear in the air.
Only sometimes
And sometimes
Is enough to keep me here.
Your kindness tastes like metal
Like biting a spoon too hard.
A light-bulb that flickers out mid-sentence.
I fold myself smaller each time
You reach for me
When I fit the shape of your mood
Just sometimes.
I keep the lamp buzzing just in case.
Your shadow drags across the carpet
Long after you leave
Sometimes I trip over it
Sometimes I let it cover me.
You scatter sweetness like loose change
And I pick it up
Count it like proof that I exist.
Your silence is a locked basement
And I've learned to crave
The sound of the door slamming shut
Just to know you were here.
Leave me in this lurch
I deserve it.
Nothing new
Nothing special
But at least it's you.
Comments
Displaying 2 of 2 comments ( View all | Add Comment )
#Haytaaslan#
I don't understand it. Like I don't even have a way to explain how this doesn't make sense to me without it being misinterpreted
I don't mind being misinterpreted, I'd like to know your thoughts.
This wasn't intended for anyone else to understand, though I appreciate any thoughts you might have on it. There's only one person aside from myself who could really know what it's about, and I like it that way.
Because of this it doesn't matter to me how anyone else might interpret it, but obviously I don't want it to seem poorly worded- so any meaning you might've taken away from this, no matter how "incorrect", would mean quite a bit to me.
If you don't understand because you believe it to be poorly written, I'd like to know as this blog specifically is open to change. Very draft-y and raw at the moment. =3
by SmogHotdog; ; Report
It's not about being poorly written but more about deserving. I mean why would you deserve it as in even if you do something bad, why would you deserve it ; even if you deserve it, why would you just accept it. I m not even gonna mention how subjective deserving even is. People do stuff that would make others sad or angry without realizing it all the time anyways.No one can know if they're truly ignorant or not. No person would act the same when an ant is killed on purpose or their family members.
by #Haytaaslan#; ; Report
Your entire response is subjective to yourself, and how you view "deserving". We do not share the same views, therefore my writing reflects my personal understanding of what is deserved.
My piece is also not as literal as you seem to be taking it, from my perspective at the time of writing this, I thought myself to be "deserving" of certain behavior- perspectives change, mine does so often.
I also often separate what I "deserve" from what I believe others "deserve", as my ego fluctuates often- something I have always struggled with. I hold myself to higher standards than I do other people, yet my actions do not always reflect this.
I am used to being able to read other people's poetry/personal pieces with what I like to think is an unbiased stance/often put my own opinions aside, so I didn't exactly write this with others who are not accustomed to doing this in mind. Sorry if it confused you or anything ('=,=)
by SmogHotdog; ; Report
Xavier
this is fire!
i especially liked:
"You text when the sky feels too heavy
Then vanish before it clears."
that went hard as well
*hard as hell
lol oops
by Xavier; ; Report
lmao thanks dude
by SmogHotdog; ; Report